Caution: Quills may be sharp Circulation: 81,826,882 Issue: 156 | 3rd day of Gathering, Y6
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Who Turned Out the Lights?

by jbennett279


NEOPIA - It might be fun to be a Neopian celebrity, running away from the crowds of fanatic n00bs in a hope to save your lucky green boots, but haven’t you thought, just once… “Haven’t we forgotten someone”? It’s time to meet Neopia’s forgotten characters, starting with a Faerie, would you believe it?


She helped make the battle dome, saved Fyora, Illusen and all the other wimps when they couldn’t be brave enough to help in the wars! The Battle Faerie certainly has some interesting stories to tell. But what have we of her? A Neopedia article, a very old picture and a shopkeeper. Surely she deserves some credit! How about her opening her own Faerie Weapons shop? Or a new Hidden Tower, with only battle items, none of these paint brushes clogging it up!

All in all, she’s a pretty cool faerie, and deserves to be thrust into the spotlight, however I need to throw some other Neopians under the limelight… Give it up for…


Saving Neopia from the vampires and ghosts that plague us at night, the Ghoul Catchers are heroes, lost in an endless sea of Neopedia articles. With only two articles of their tale, it is hard to work out much about them, except that they are rightful heroes. Whether it’s trapping the Ghost Lupe, defeating Werelupes, or finding the hidden diaries to banish all vampires, the Ghoul Catchers definitely deserved a round of applause and some fan mail! Last seen running from Werelupes on Mystery Island, the Ghoul Catchers are Bren the Yellow Wocky, Binsjin the Blue Kacheek and Boolin the red Kiko. So give it up for the ghoul catchers!

They deserve their own game, plushies, books and so much more! I mean wouldn’t we all be better off without vampires? Next up is…


Well known to Battledome freaks addicts, the Highland Chia is a formidable foe. This haggis chomping, log flinging, kilt-wearing Chia is scary BEFORE you go into battle with him! The Highland Chia just wants to get on with his battling career, so maybe someone should send him a gift once in a while, before they battle him, like a fresh haggis, a new kilt or a sharp weapon.

Maybe you’re thinking, “Why on Earth does he deserve anything?” Well it’s because everyday, thousands of Neopians beat him up, and he gets nothing in return. He didn’t even get his paint brush on the market (Tartan Paint Brush)

He deserves his own plushies, his tartan paint brush, some weapons with his name on, or a day off all this battling to sit down with some of his Mam’s haggis!

Are Chias the most forgotten of all species, because here’s another!


Sir Fufon Lui has somehow managed to disappear from Neopia’s eyes, sinking deep into the Neopedia. Lui, another Chia, is straight out of the three musketeers. He loves duelling, his moustache, and any fair damsel he can find!

Helping Neopia fight off the Lupe Raiders, Lui has saved many a shop from being ransacked, and for what?

A Neopedia article and people making jokes about his name. Surely he deserves something? Couldn’t he become a Battledome challenger, defeating every scallywag to dare break the law, steal his damsels or disgrace him and his moustache.


God of the Island natives, Mumbo Pango is as dangerous as ever! With the Island TCG set coming soon, and many natives becoming restless, it looks like the days are numbered for the tribes holiday side, as it returns to the savage natives it began with. But what about Mumbo Pango, their ever ready god?

He hasn’t been fed well since the ancient Sacrificers competition, which has been removed from Neopia, his chef is going mad every day trying to serve up new and exciting gourmet foods. But even the Chef now is being ignored, so how’s poor Mumbo going to eat?

Of course, people make offerings every day to his Cooking Pot, run by faithful Jhuidah. But always he has to give in return, with more and more people figuring out the right combinations, this one a sand sculpture, that one a weird petpet, this one a Meepit gnome, surely he must be sick of it!

Why don’t we give his two luckless servants a day off? And every Neopian will come forth and give him a little bit of food? Why don’t we run Sacrificers 2, give him some staff members again! Grumpy Old King, how about Grumpy Mumbo Pango? The possibilities are endless.


Exiled for murdering that Good King Coltzan, back in the old Usurper plot, Sankara hasn’t been seen since she left. But what has happened to her? Has she gone back to her old homeland, defeated by the evil King Heskas and his army, as the last of the royal fourth Khonsu dynasty, liberating the people of Khamtef?

Surely there should be a game, Sankara’s Escape, or a new land, Khamtef itself, in which Sankara returns and there is a war to help free the Khamtef people from King Heskas’ evil reign? Then again, the other people from Usurper have also been forgotten, but at least they weren’t exiled!


Another luckless faerie, the Dung Faerie hides around the Meridell Rubbish Dump, conjuring up dung for lucky visitors. Is it her fault she got stuck with such a boring job? In her spare time she even goes around Pick your Own, adding dung to the game? Surely she deserves to be noticed as a REAL faerie? Yes, SHE DOES! And she is real, you non believers!

After all, how else would you get the Pick your Own avatar? She deserves her own plushie, a dung mansion, her own Quests and so much more! And if enough people asked for it, maybe she could even get a job in Tyrannia, where she would be much more suited and appreciated.

So ends my article, I hoped you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed researching it. All the characters in this article do appear in Neopia, I would like to confirm and maybe the staff could take notice of my suggestions?


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