|teh 1337est n00zpaper
||Issue: 728 | 15th day of Eating, Y18
|The Many Travels of a Pretty KadoatieThe name is Pretty Kitty, and let me tell you from the start that I’m a good kadoatie --- one of the best of my species, if I dare to add. Not being proud or anything here, just you know, when you’re so confident that it’s the truth, you sometimes get quite eager to share it with everyone you meet!|
Also by button04_nice
|Finding Time For Your Pets When Life Gets BusyWe’ve all had times when we are so busy we barely have time to eat and sleep, let alone find time to feed and play with our Neopets. Rather than let our accounts languish, there are some things that you can do to keep your account moving forward, even in the busiest of times.|
|Why Did You Downsize? - Part 2A popular article of mine was called "Why Did You Downsize?," and it received a lot of fan mail. The idea of downsizing struck a chord with many of my fellow players, and they admitted that after reading my article, they were inspired to downsize their own accounts.|
|The Ten Worst Petpets for Faerieland: A ListIf you’ve ever visited my homeland of Faerieland, you know exactly how full of purple, fluffy nonsense it is. Sure, it’s cute for the first week or so, but being surrounded by the same pink billowy clouds day after day gets exhausting. You know what else is exhausting? Choosing a petpet. |
|Eau De Neopia: Neopia's Top 10 PerfumesHow is a Neopian to know the best from the worst perfumes out there? And what kind of perfumes there are available here in Neopia? Have you ever wanted to try something a bit more daring than but not sure if you can pull off that bottle of Sloth Spring Scented Perfume? Well, we have compiled the top 10 perfumes available in Neopia for you to digest. So sit back and prepare to be educated. |
|Aspargus and Honey: Neopian Recipes for SpringtimeHere, I have devised some recipes, based on some of my favourite Neopian springtime suitable foods and tested them in my own kitchen. Get cooking!|
|Rhoasy's Raddest Restaurants: Kelp!We’re finally tackling one of the most well known- and most expensive- restaurants in all of Neopia! So put on your fancy dress, get all those NeoPoints out of the bank, and make sure your fur is groomed- we’re on our way to Kelp, a fine dining establishment that will leave your stomach full and your wallet empty.|
|Ten Items That ALMOST ExistViva la Pombrero!|
|Character Re-Introductions: Topsi This time I'm interviewing the Cybunny who’s been the host of the Festival of the Neggs for the past two years now: Topsi. |
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"Confessions of King Skarl's Hair Stylist" by redken9x9
I’ve been told that many people would – What? I can’t say that word? Fine.
I’ve been told that many people would MURDER to have my job. I say – YOU CAN HAVE IT!
My name is Marcel Picklesby. Like anyone else, I was foolish enough to think that working for royalty would land me in the spotlight and get me featured on the Neopian Times for my dazzling artwork and suave sense of style. Instead, I’m featured on the Neopian Times for completely different reasons. I’m here to clear up the confusion behind my departure from Meridell Castle and I want all of Neopia to know the truth.
I came on board shortly after all the drama with Kass concluded. The hair stylist before me disappeared after a fatal encounter with Kiss the Mortog. Poor thing! I do believe the Mortog’s are responsible for more fatalities than Darigan and Snow Roller combined. It’s gotten so bad in fact that a new swamp is forming right on the borders of Meridell! What is that majestic green pond you ask? Why, it’s none other than a myriad of a Mortog guts and Avvie Collector tears!
But I digress.
Dear friends, the real reason I’m speaking to you today is for the sole purpose that you do not fall victim to the senseless mind control that Skarl is not only inflicting upon the inhabitants of Meridell, but on the whole of Neopia itself.
“Sorry about the mess,” the pink Uni leading the way said. Common consensus was that her name was Rose, but almost no one bothered to ask her whether that was correct. “I keep telling them that we need better construction and supplies, but they haven’t done anything but install more cages since they built the transfers department – and that was years ago now.”
|An Unexpected Meeting|
Madeliynn was a simple, tender-hearted Blumaroo who lived alone in a small town outside Neopia Central. She had not seen much of the wider world Neopia, though she dreamt of it, for she was quite terrified of the wonders and terrors she might face alike.