Dieter and the Fatness Issue
"Hey, Dieter, eaten any good snow lately?" a voice taunted
from behind Dieter.
The Polarchuck turned around, searching for the
origin of the voice.
"Are you scared, Dieter? Do you think the big-bad
voice is going to get you?"
Suddenly, Dieter knew. His fright was replaced
"Kibbly, that's really....really..." Dieter paused,
at a loss for words.
The voice started laughing; Dieter now knew that
the voice belonged to Kibbly the invisible Warf. More voices started laughing
too. Dieter sighed. He was having a bad day; it wasn't the best time to be attacked
by The Invisibles; a gang of invisible petpets that tormented visible petpets,
"Guys, can we just be friends? We could torment
other petpets together," Dieter lamely suggested.
Kibbly laughed again, followed by his faithful
"Don't you wish, Fatso. Just keep to your snow
Dieter heard the soft crunch of snow as the gang
walked past Dieter, invisible arms punching him in the stomach as they passed.
You see, Dieter was the star of a game called
Snowmuncher, which you have probably heard of. Dieter loved playing the game
and helping Neopians learn Neopoints, plus he loved eating the snow. Eating
snow since the day he was born had not helped his looks, though, and two years
later he was as round around his middle as a ball. The Invisibles, unfortunately,
came to be soon after Dieter got his middle. He was used to their tormenting
by now, but it still did not make getting through it any easier. Dieter prayed
every night that a miracle would happen and he would be skinny and athletic.
He didn't really want to be in The Invisibles, but he needed to
be in it to keep from being bullied. Dieter had a feeling if he was skinny they
might let him in; he could be their one visible member.
Dieter sadly continued his walk home. He rubbed
his aching stomach and cried in self pity as he trudged through the snow. His
home was not too far away from Snowmuncher, and so he was there quickly. His
mother waited just inside the door for him.
"Tough day?" Mother asked.
Dieter nodded. "Do you have dinner ready? I need
Mother nodded and began the short walk to the
kitchen. Dieter rubbed away his tears and followed her. Mother was a plump Polarchuck.
Dieter was fatter than her, but she was still plump. She had blond hair and
wore too much bright red lipstick. In public, Dieter was embarrassed to be seen
with her, but at home he enjoyed her company.
In the kitchen, Grandma Polarchuck sat at the
small, round table. She was also plump and had gray hair tied into a tight bun.
She was hard of hearing and said, "eh?" at every thing said to her.
Dieter sat down next to Grandma, who he liked
more than Mother.
"How was your day, Grandma?" Dieter asked as
dinner was put in front of him, a plate full of steaming vegetables and Neggs.
"Eh?" Grandma asked.
"HOW WAS YOUR DAY, GRANDMA?" Dieter shouted.
"You don't have to shout, Sonny, I'm not deaf.
My day was good; how was yours?" Grandma finally replied.
"Bad. There was no business at Snowmuncher today
and The Invisibles tormented me on my way home."
"I'm sorry, Sweetie," Mother said as she sat
down next to Grandma. "Did they torment you because you're fat?"
Dieter sadly nodded, poking his vegetables with
his fork. Mother suddenly smiled.
"I forgot to tell you, Dieterkins..."
"I hate that pet name, Mother."
"Hate than one too."
"Fine; I'll just call you Dieter! Happy?"
"Anyways, I forgot to tell you a faerie came
in and left me a message to tell you."
"Really? About what?"
"The exact message was: 'Tell Dieter that what
he wants his waiting for him on Mystery Island, right underneath Techo Mountain.'"
"Is what I want something to make me not fat?"
"That's the whole message."
"Well I better get going, then," Dieter said,
"Aren't you going to eat your dinner?" Mother
"I'm not that hungry."
Dieter kissed Mother, and then Grandma, who said,
"Bye, when you see me again I'll be skinny!"
Dieter said as he marched out the door and into the cool Terror Mountain air.
At sunrise the next morning, Dieter found himself
eagerly waiting to hop off the ferry onto Mystery Island with the rest of the
Neopians on his boat. He bounded off, happy as a Gelert puppy. He almost ran
right by the Spardel holding a sign that in bright, red letters said, "Dieter
the Polarchuck." Dieter stopped short next to the Spardel.
"Hello," Dieter said cautiously.
"Close your eyes," the Spardel instructed, ignoring
"Why?" Dieter asked.
"Just do it!" the Spardel screamed.
Dieter quickly closed his eyes. They were not
closed for but a second when Dieter heard, "open them."
Dieter opened them to see Techo Mountain, which
he was not standing by before.
"How'd you do that?" Dieter asked the Spardel,
but the Spardel was gone.
Shrugging, Dieter proceeded to march straight
forward, searching for whatever it was he wanted. He found it quickly; it was
pretty obvious to where it was. It was a package wrapped in brown paper. There
was a note attached, which Dieter took off. It read:
Drink the contents of the bottle you will find
right away, and then close your eyes. Open them in exactly five seconds, and
when you do you will be in front of Snowmuncher, and skinny. Good luck in your
new, skinny life!
Intrigued, Dieter picked up the package and tore
off the brown paper. He revealed a pink and blue drink in a small glass bottle,
corked at the top. He immediately pulled out the cork and chugged the drink
down. It actually tasted good, like some tropical fruits he had tried once.
Dieter closed his eyes.
One Haunted Woods, two Haunted Woods, three
Haunted Woods, four Haunted Woods, five Haunted Woods, Dieter thought, and
then opened his eyes.
He was, indeed, in front of Snowmuncher on his
native Terror Mountain. Dieter decided people could live without Snowmuncher
today, and started on his way home.
About halfway home, Dieter felt a tap on his
shoulder. He turned around, searching for whoever did that. He saw no one.
"Hi, Kibbly," Dieter said with a smirk.
"Hey, Dieter, I just have to say you look great!
How did you get skinny so fast?" Kibbly asked from Dieter's right side.
"Oh, let's just say it was a miracle."
"I was wondering if you wanted to join The Invisibles?
You can be our visible representative."
Dieter thought about it. For some reason, he
actually did want to be part of The Invisibles.
"That would be great," Dieter said with a smile.
"Great, we'll meet you at Snowmuncher at, say,
five?" Kibbly asked.
"Sounds good to me; see you there!"
Dieter waved goodbye as he saw footsteps in the
snow moving away. Dieter continued on his way home, happier than ever. When
he arrived home, Mother kissed him over and over again.
"You look so good, Dietie!" she shouted over
and over again.
Grandma smiled and gave him a pat on his back.
"You look great, Sonny," she said.
The three sat down at the table for a huge celebratory
dinner. They ate until all three were beyond stuffed, and then went to bed,
ready to face the next day.
The funny thing about this whole story is, the
potion was fake; Dieter did not lose a pound from it. The only thing it did
was boost his confidence, so it made everyone else think he was skinnier also.
That shows what some extra confidence can do.