Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 196,453,187 Issue: 907 | 17th day of Swimming, Y22
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The Thieves Code — Otherwise Known as the Mysterious Book


     Understand that there is no honour among thieves, no rules or regulations, no true code. Take what you can and give nothing in return, that is all.

     As such, this tome is not a code, but a guide. The Codex Raptorum, as it was once known, is a record of our lore, passed down through the ages.

     On the Origins of our Most Celebrated Guild

     There are many guilds of Thieves in Neopia, some are older than others, but none are larger or more widespread than the Thieves Guild. It has existed, in one form or another, since the very dawn of time, first founded in ancient Tyrannia. At various points in various countries, it has been by turns exiled, hunted, lauded, and awarded. Twice, purges by zealots have almost claimed it completely, but it stood strong.

     The Guild is headed by the Guild Master, who wields complete and absolute control over all members. It is he, or she, that decides the structure, membership, operations, and location of the Guild. The Guild Master can be challenged for their leadership at any point, though it is a contest of combat, and a fight to the death.

     Membership of the Guild is granted by way of a pendant — an emerald being encircled by a golden Cobrall. Only those bearing it are permitted entrance to the Guild Halls throughout Neopia.

     The current leader is Kanrik, who took the position by staying by the side of the former leader, Galem Darkhand, until he gained an opportunity to slay him. Currently, the Guild is known to operate out of Neopia Central, the Lost Desert, Tyrannia, Meridell, the Haunted Woods, and has its headquarters on Terror Mountain.

     Membership of this Guild can be revoked and thieves exiled, as in the cases of Masila and Hanso.

     Of the Lost Desert Guilds

     The Lost Desert is home to many lesser thieves guilds which the larger Thieves Guild sometimes use for recruitment. By far the most well known are the Desert Scarabs. Based out of Sakhmet, these street urchins have scarab tattoos on their bodies to mark them as part of the clan. The nature of the tattoos is as the nature of the group — membership of the Scarabs is for life. Only one member has ‘left’ the group, Queen Nabile of Qasala, though she returns occasionally. The Scarabs mainly go in for petty theft, but greater heists have been known.

     Of the Desert’s other guilds, there are the Sun Chasers and the Pyramid Prowlers. The Hand of the Anubis is a semi-religious group of thieves. The Dagger Clan, known for their distinctive Cobrall Daggers, are also active. A small group of smugglers known as the Oasis Runners have also been observed.

     There are also independent thieves and bandits operating out of the desert in the wild dunes, but between the enforcement of the Thieves Guild and the local groups, these freelancers do not last long.

     Of the Aisha Thieves

     There exists in Neopia Central a double act of Aisha siblings known as the Aisha Thieves. Purrow and Meesha, as they are called, are known for their daring theft from the Chocolate Factory. Though their hideout is known to be somewhere in the city’s sewers, it has yet to be found by Defenders or Guild alike.

     The Aisha Thieves have recently begun to encroach northwards into Thieves Guild territory. Given that Purrow has previously insulted the Guild by stealing a membership pendant, it does not seem as if this will end well.

     Of the Powers of the Faerie Queen

     Once, long ago, a previous Queen if Faerieland recognised the value of thieves and gave them an official mark. Fyora, however, does not see thieves at large in the same light. Yet, she still holds the power to appoint and uplift Master Thieves.

     In theory, these thieves rank even above Guild Masters, but in practice, it is a ceremonial title with no real power within the community. Still, many thieves treat it with a measure of respect. To date, Fyora has only used her executive power to name two Master Thieves. One, Kelland, now sits on the council of Altador. The other, Hanso, serves the Queen herself, collecting dangerous Faerie artefacts.

     Of the Legendary Bori Treasure

     Note: The following information is now outdated. A previous version of this codex obtained by Galem Darkhand caused him to seek out and find the Heart of the Mountain, but he failed to claim it. The awoken Bori now guard it, making such a theft nearly impossible.

     In times of old the Bori ruled Terror Mountain and used their mining skills to amass a vast treasure house of jewels. None among them shone more brilliantly than the crimson Heart of the Mountain gem, a magical jewel found deep in the Ice Caves.

     But then a monstrous beast from the Lost Desert rose up and sought the Bori’s riches. The Bringer of Night, as they called him, waged a terrible war against the Bori which they looked set to lose. At last, the Bori decided that their only path to victory lay in sealing their own tunnels. They used the Heart of the Mountain to freeze the deep Ice Caves solid, and encase their entire race in ice so they might keep a silent vigil over their treasure.

     The Bringer, knowing his path was blocked, returned to the Lost Desert and entombed himself there, lying dormant until the ice melted.

     The Bori still sleep in their caves, their exact location lost to time. But a smart thief might yet discover them, and wind riches beyond their wildest imagination.

     Of the National Neopian Bank

     All of the stores in Neopia Central see vast sums of money change hands daily, but it is the central bank that is arguably the biggest haul in all of Neopia. Trillions of Neopoints are stored in the vaults. If a thief got their hands in even a fraction, they could comfortably retire. It is no surprise then that several thieves regularly attempt such heists.

     Uzarro, the Scorchio and Techo Thieves, and the Meerca Brothers are the most prolific.

     Now, the bank has invested heavily in security. The vaults have every sensor conceivable, and if they are triggered the Defenders of Neopia are alerted immediately. Breaking in through the walls or floor is not an option. The staff go through routine security checks, making getting an inside man difficult.

     The only option remaining is to steal freshly deposited Neopoints from the bank floor before they are transferred to the vaults. This is possible, but requires a quick thief striking at the busiest point of the day. Even so, beware, as the tellers can trigger bars to descend, trapping a potential thief in the doorway until the Defenders arrive to arrest them.

     Of the Qasalan Royal Treasury

     Word of the riches in Qasala’s treasure house soon spread after King Jazan commissioned one hundred solid gold statues of his wife, Nabile, as a present for her birthday. This alone attracted the attention of the Meerca Brothers, but there is much more gold to be had for those willing.

     Jazan is a wizard, and has enchanted the treasury so that it works strangely. It is split into ten rooms, each housing exactly ten of the statues, as well as Neopoints and jewels. However, all of the treasure has been enchanted so that, by default, it will stick to the ceiling. The only way to liberate the goods from a maze of boxes is to move the contents, creating a path for the loot to fall down. This of course takes time, meaning you must work quickly, or guard patrols must either be taken out or paid off.

     Jazan has one last trick up his sleeve — he believes that if he cannot have his treasure, no one can. Several of the boxes contain Lyins that will awake when moved. These specially trained Petpets will eat any treasure they find, preventing thieves from pocketing it.

     Of Fyora’s Keep

     Deep at the heart of the Faerie Queen’s castle, there is a tower, invisible to all eyes and magic. This Hidden Tower, it is rumoured, was constructed by the first Faerie Queen as a personal retreat, but now Fyora uses it as Faerieland’s treasure house.

     All manner of magical artefacts that could fetch a pretty penny are stored within, as well as vast sums of Neopoints. To date, only three people have managed to breach its walls. The Warlock Hubrid Nox, who uses an Odial Sphere to steal the contents, the sorceress Quizara, who tricked her way into Fyora’s graces, and a team of Alien Aishas led by Captain Xelqued, who crashed their spaceship into the tower wall.

     Obviously, the Hidden Tower is not a simple target. Although access to the Faerie Palace is not difficult to obtain, the tower is heavily guarded. Specially trained Faerie Kougras guard the doors, Faeries watch the skies, and even the fall of Faerieland did not destroy the tower. The only way in appears to be being invited in by Fyora herself, either genuinely or via trickery. And even should you succeed in the task, making a getaway through a city filled with angry Faeries is a trial in itself.

     Raiding the Hidden Tower should only ever be attempted by those of considerable skill and with great resources at their disposal.

     Of the Fell Wurm’s Hoard

     Within the Ice Caves of Terror Mountain there dwells a giant Snowickle that the locals call the Snowager. It has lived there for as long as any can remember, and for all that time, has been collecting all manner of treasures.

     Stealing from the beast is not difficult, as it sleeps regularly atop the pile of loot. It is getting away with the crime that is the difficult part. If the Snowager hears a noise, it will wake, and in the Ice Caves even the smallest sound can echo. The fortunate may face a blast if the Snowager’s icy breath, a lesson not to try again. But it is those who escape the blast that should be worried, as the Snowager will pursue them all the way down the mountain if needed to reclaim his treasure.

     It goes without saying, then, that only the most silent of thieves should attempt such a theft.

     Of Sakhmet Palace

     The grand palace of Sakhmet is a treasure in itself, though Amira also keeps a sizeable amount of gold. Foreign dignitaries also visit, their pockets waiting to be emptied.

     But how to gain access? There are several ways. The city’s sewer system passes close to the palace’s catacombs. Thieves may knock through, gaining access to the palace as long as they do not mind tangling with mummies first.

     The palace has little magical security, so potions of invisibility allow thieves to walk right through the front door. Of course, sometimes magically inclined guests are staying, so other methods may be considered.

     The palace guard uniform changes so regularly that few are aware of what is the current standard. Obtaining an old uniform would prove an effective disguise. Certain guards are also open to bribery, provided you pay well enough. Even tried and tested sneaking methods can succeed provided you arrange a suitable distraction.

     It has been claimed that, if the occupants of the palace were occupied, a thief could simply climb the palace walls.

     Of the Moltarans

     Note: The information that follows is outdated. It would appear that the Obsidian Heart has been stolen. The identity of the thief and the gem’s current location is unknown. It is assumed a private contractor arranged the theft as no Guilds were involved.

     Most of Moltara’s treasures are in technology, but there is one treasure that glistens. The Moltarans have miners who routinely dig for obsidian in the caverns, but recently discovered a large diamond in a vein they were digging. This they named the Obsidian Heart. Although there are persistent demands from Moltarans separatists for it to be returned to the caverns where it was found, the diamond is currently exhibited in Moltara City’s town hall.

     The mining company that claims ownership of the diamond has invested heavily in security, with armed guards patrolling the room night and day. Of course, these are third party employees and not city officials, so would be open to bribery.

     The diamond’s pedestal is linked to a contraption which will blow steam out of the town hall’s roof if the diamond is moved. There are plenty of tinkers in Moltara City, however, who would be able to disable the device.

     Indeed, disguising oneself as separatists from the caverns might even provide a cover story and allow for a quick escape back to the surface.

     Of Shenkuu

     The Imperial Keep is housed in the Emperor’s Palace within the Imperial City. It is exceptionally hard to gain access to, but inside lie the riches of Shenkuu’s many gold mines, as well as jewels and the Imperial Seal, the authority of the Emperor himself.

     The Keep is in the heart of the Palace, so it is impossible to break in through the outer walls. The position of the city atop a mountain also makes tunnelling up difficult. The guard patrols are constant and regularly changed to be unpredictable. Shenkuu guards are notoriously difficult to bribe, especially those within the palace. Only a very nimble thief who can move quickly and stick to the shadows has a hope of reaching the Keep, and even then will only be able to steal small amounts.

     Of Meridell

     King Skarl’s Keep is buried deep under Meridell Castle, in the ruins of one of the former constructs to stand on the site. It can be accessed through the castle, but this route is heavily guarded by some of the best knights in the land. However, there is a secondary access point through Meridell Town’s sewer system. The entrance to this is in a building currently used as the Thieves Guild meeting hall.

     The reason the Guild has not emptied the Keep already is that it has a supernatural protector. A gigantic Draik Skeleton has been reanimated to attack anyone entering in the Keep save Skarl himself. Even those defeating the skeleton once will find him rising again. Meridell’s chapter of the Thieves Guild is currently researching methods of dispelling the magic, but at present no results have been recorded.

     Note: For those hoping to raid the Keep for the ancient and powerful artefact known as Fyora’s Rod, it has been moved to Faerieland under the protection of Queen Fyora herself.

     Of the Kreludor Caves

     Now that the Pirate Caves of Krawk Island have been demolished, many adventurers are looking higher for their next target.

     The caves beneath Kreludor’s surface, disputed in ownership between Dr. Sloth and the local Grundos, contain a great deal of hidden treasure. The deeper you go, the more treasure there is to find.

     Dr. Sloth’s robots patrol the caves and will kill on sight. There are also natural dangers to contend with like cave-ins and rooms full of spikes. However, a skilled thief should be able to avoid all of these.

     Remember to bring oxygen tanks. Although the surface air on Kreludor is breathable, the thin, stagnant air within the caves most surely is not.

     Assuming one escapes the caves in one piece, you will then have to deal with the angry Grundos on the surface — make sure you have a fast getaway ship.

     Of Mystery Island’s Treasures

     Mystery Island, even now, holds many undiscovered treasures. Explorers routinely find new discoveries deep in the jungle. This can be an interesting pastime for a thief, as such things are considered better than base mugging — and supported, even, by institutions such as the Seekers.

     The long dead city of Geraptiku is said to have treasures hidden in the depths of a tomb at its heart. A maddened ghost Hissi protects them, but a good thief should be able to avoid it.

     The magical Golden Spear is another long lost relic worth millions. It is said to be protected by a stone golem who will kill anyone who touches it. Although many have gone looking for the spear, none have returned.

     Of the still living, the Kawillawoa Tribe worship a Mystical Tiki Totem which protects those who hold it. It is easily stolen, but be sure to leave the island quickly, as the tribe are not above hiring adventurers to track down thieves and recover the totem.

     Of This Tome

     You who hold this book, know that it is not the first version to exist, nor roll it be the last. It is your duty to record your exploits within and correct that which becomes outdated so that those who come after you can learn from it.

     In the purges of centuries past, when we were hunted and slain, thieves did not record such things. As such, millennia of spoken history, and details of hidden riches and their locations have been lost. Even the Seekers do not know them. Lost forever.

     Never again.

     The Thieves Code must endure through the ages, passing from one hand to another.

     Good luck.

     To be continued with another book…

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