21 Flavors of Neopia’s Grossest Ice Cream
As the Neopian days become sunnier and warmer, our thoughts naturally turn to one of life’s most indulgent pleasures: ice cream. My Neopets and I can’t seem to get enough of that velvety sweet treat. Whether we are exploring the Ice Caves of Terror Mountain or strolling along the shores of Kiko Lake, a delectable cool and creamy ice cream cone in hand just seems to enhance the experience. My Neopets have probably tried almost all of the conventional flavors, and though they love the old favorites such as chocolate, peach and strawberry, they have recently informed me that they are eager to venture forth into unexplored ice cream territory. Hence, after extensive and grueling research that included lots of sampling in many of Neopia’s finest shops, I discovered a bounty of exciting new flavors that will jump-start your taste buds, broaden your confectionery horizons and challenge your better judgment. Keep in mind that these suggestions are not recommended for the fainthearted. And on that cautionary note, I present to you, dear reader, twenty-one of the grossest ice cream flavors available in Neopia.
1. Bacon and Eggs Ice Cream
What better way to start the day than with a hearty helping of scrambled eggs blended into a mouthwatering ice cream? This selection is perfect for those who have no time for breakfast as all that nutritional goodness is encased in a cone fashioned from raw bacon. It is the sensible choice for Neopets on-the-go who tend to skip the most important meal of the day.
2. Banana Lice Cream
Feed this to your Mynci and she will appreciate the extra protein in her diet. The flecks you see are not to be mistaken for raisins.
3. Beetroot Ice Cream
This ice cream is made hot and spicy with the addition of a liberal helping of freshly ground pepper. Due to the enormous popularity of this vegetable, large chunks of beetroot are blended into a vanilla base to create a healthy and visually appealing, blood red frozen treat.
4. Brain Ice Cream
If you are skeptical, be assured that it does indeed contain brain matter. Your Zombie Neopets will request this one again and again.
5. Chewed Gum Ice Cream Cone
This description on the carton guarantees the consumer of the wholesomeness and purity of the product: “Don’t worry the gum was all chewed by the cook.”
6. Chocolate Ice Cream with Pickle Syrup
All this and extra pickles too! This frozen treat is certain to satisfy all of your Neopet’s cravings.
7. Dirt Ice Cream
My Neopets are not completely sold on this flavor, but my Symol loves it! It’s a pleasure to watch him dig in to this treat.
8. Dung Ice Cream
I must admit that everybody in my house takes a pass on this one.
9. Fish Flavour Ice Cream
This is an unrivaled favorite of Grarrls. Don’t even bother to soil a bowl. Just hand him the carton. No spoon is required.
10. Grey Ice Cream
Grey Cheese is the secret ingredient that gives this ice cream its dreary color. Keep it away from your allergy-prone Grarrl. A raincoat and umbrella are recommended when eating this depressing concoction, and therefore the manufacturer has thoughtfully included them with every purchase.
11. Ketchup Ice Cream
It’s delicious on its own, but double it up with a scoop of Potato Ice Cream and you have an unforgettable frozen experience.
12. Mac and Cheese Ice Cream
Now you can have your dinner and dessert all in one fell scoop, erm…swoop.
13. Metal Ice Cream Sundae
This ice cream is a metallurgical marvel. Comprised of an alloy of metals, this dessert is certain to be a big hit with your Robot ‘pet. The recipe for the piquant oil sauce that lavishly tops this delicacy is a highly guarded trade secret.
14. Molten Ice Cream Cone
This concoction is a scientific miracle. A thorough chemical analysis of the ingredients in this product has revealed that no actual ice exists in this ice cream, yet…there it is. This delicacy must be eaten rapidly as it tends to dissolve the cone rather quickly. It is emphatically recommended that you do not feed this to your Ice Neopets.
15. Mustard Ice Cream
The mustard flavoring is the key ingredient that will revive your comatose taste buds. And, the delicate raspberry sauce elevates this ice cream to the category of ambrosia. This is a favorite in my Neohome, and a scoop of this icy treat atop a boiled hot dog creates a scrumptious sundae that will challenge your will power and put into jeopardy your commitment to lose a few pounds.
16. Nachos and Cheese Ice Cream
This ice cream is a taste bud fiesta. It’s the perfect accent for your next celebration, and so much easier to prepare than the traditional plate of Nachos and Cheese. Instead of slaving all day over a bubbling kettle of hot melted cheese, simply scoop this delicious ice cream into a cone, preferably one fashioned from a Cheese Tortilla but any sugar cone will do. Then top it with crispy tortilla chips and you have an unforgettable treat that your guests will rave about for weeks after the last party balloon deflates.
17. Octopus Ice Cream Platter
This is the dessert to awaken all your senses. Who could possibly resist this lovely pale pink ice cream redolent with the fruity fragrance of ripe strawberries and the tantalizing aroma of fresh octopus? The hypnotic wriggling of these adorable creatures will tempt you to forego the first bite. But that would be ill-advised, for that first bite is a wonderful explosion of taste and texture. It’s a complete ice cream experience.
18. Pink Spooky Ice Cream
This treat is pricey, but if you are celebrating a special occasion or are simply in the mood to splurge on your ‘pets, then it is an excellent choice. What makes this ice cream so expensive (and irresistible) is the eyeball that provides an artful and extraordinary finishing touch to this icy creation. No commonplace cherry-on-top will do. The manufacturer went to great lengths and personal sacrifice to provide only the finest eyeballs available in Neopia. After the first sampling, I asked my Neopets if they would eat this selection again and the “eyes” have it.
19. Pork Ice Cream
This ice cream delivers a meaty flavor packed with robust gammon goodness, and provides an impressive weekly serving of protein in a single helping. You and your Neopets can enjoy this guilt-free dessert anytime as a sensible dinner substitute.
20. Spring Onion Ice Cream
Onion-lovers of Neopia, rejoice! Your dream of an assertive dessert that isn’t shy on flavor has finally become a reality. Indulge in this creation made specifically for those who know what they want from a frozen treat and have no compunction about the likelihood of social rejection. However, if you tend to be thoughtful of your fellow Neopians, you might choose to pair this selection with a scoop of Mint Ice Cream. Your friends will thank you for your consideration.
21. Spyder Ice Cream Sundae
Unfortunately, this selection is a bit costly and can only be obtained in user shops. But it is absolutely worth the time and hassle. One bite of this chilly delicacy will turn you into a Spyder fan for life. And rest assured that only non-poisonous Spyders were used in the making of this product.
All of the unusual choices presented here pack a potent punch of flavor and will make your taste buds scream for more. It is my desire that you and your Neopets spend the warm and wonderful days ahead sampling every flavor on this list, and perhaps discovering a few of your own. I hope you’ve enjoyed this “scoop” on gross ice cream flavors in Neopia. It’s a “sherbet” that you’ll love each and every one of them!