Secrets of the DMBGPoP
The Discarded Magical Blue Grundo of Prosperity (or, as I like to call it, the DMBGPoP) has been an unquestioned part of the Faerieland landscape for nearly a decade. In recent years, it has become part of many Neopians' daily routine, bringing joy and the occasional free plushie. Despite its popularity, however, few know anything about the plushie, choosing not to look a gift Uni in the mouth.
Fortunately, if there is one thing I'm good at, it's asking questions. In an effort to keep my quest for knowledge manageable, I came up with three questions which would drive my investigation:
Who abandoned the plushie and why?
This plushie has been abandoned in Faerieland since Year 6, and a popular attraction for almost as long, but it still hasn't been claimed. Surely its owner has heard of it or its powers by now. And if they've abandoned it for good, why didn't the Faeries treat it as litter? It was plainly visible as soon as one entered Faerieland, marring otherwise flawless white clouds, but the Faeries didn't so much as move it into the city.
Why has it suddenly lived up to its name?
Since the plushie was first found, it's been known as magical, if only for its association with the Faeries. For five years, this was just a name, as it didn't actually do anything. Then it mysteriously began granting its visitors gifts and blessings, an event which just so happened to coincide with the Faerie Festival. Was this an intentional act by the Faeries, a result of all the ambient magic, or something more sinister? Perhaps the DMBGPoP is not the source of these gifts at all, just serving as a convenient figurehead.
Why does the DMBGPoP look so sad?
You may think that, as the DMBGPoP is just a plushie, its expression wouldn't mean anything. However, visitors to the plushie before it began granting boons occasionally described a different expression on the plushie's face, one of surprise or confusion. This suggests that the plushie's frown is internally motivated. More worryingly, the look of confusion has not been seen since Y11. Given the number of visitors the plushie gets, many of whom take the time to talk to it, it seems plausible that the DMBGPoP knows something we don't, something which causes it to frown constantly.
When I went back over these questions, a clear thread emerged: the Faeries' inexplicable behavior toward and possible involvement with the DMBGPoP. And who better to seek answers from than the Faeries themselves? Spurred by visions of the DMBGPoP's horrible knowledge, I strode into the Faerie Quests building, ready to question Fyora herself.
As it turns out, even with the reconstruction of Faerieland complete, Fyora is constantly working to ensure the safety and prosperity of Neopia and its inhabitants. As such, my interview didn't go quite as I had hoped…
Fyora: It looks as though you are not on a quest at the moment. As you spend time in Neopia, we will summon you to assist us as needed.
Me: Actually, I'm not here for a quest. I was hoping I could interview you about the Discarded Magical Blue Grundo Plushie of Prosperity for an article I'm writing for the Neopian Times.
Fyora: I'm sorry. I would love to help, but right now, I'm too busy. If you like, I can refer you to one of my assistants. She might be able to help you.
And with that, I was sent off. Still, a lead was a lead, so I followed her directions and found myself in the office of a bespectacled Air Faerie.
Me:Would you mind if I asked you a few questions for an article I'm writing?
Assistant: I wouldn't mind, but I'm not sure if I would be very helpful. I've been trapped in a bottle for the past few years, so I might have missed a lot while I was gone.
Me: Anything you can tell me would help, thank you. For reference, though, how long have you been free?
Assistant: Only a week or so.
Me: And you're already back in an office?
Assistant: Yes, it's part of Fyora's program for recently released Faeries. She hires us to help her out in the office until we've adjusted to anything we missed. I was skeptical at first, but when I saw that Faerieland was on the ground… I think I'll need that time. At least the inside of the office is like I remember. Freaking Balthazar.
Me: I'd never thought of that, but it makes sense. What's the last thing you remember from before the bottle?
Assistant: I think Lord Kass was invading Meridell? Sorry, it's been a while…
Me: … Yeah, I can see that. Okay, last question: Have you ever heard other Faeries talking about a magical blue Grundo plushie?
Assistant: No, I haven't… not that that means much. Sorry.
Me: It's fine. It's not your fault, and at least your lack of knowledge gives me something to work with.
Assistant: If you say so. Good luck with your article!
I declined her offer of a quest and left the office. I could always try to ask another of Fyora's assistants, but if they were all a part of this program, the chances that they would be able to tell me anything else were low. Instead, it was time to seek out another Faerie, one who had definitely been around long enough to know about the plushie: Jhudora.
As little as I wanted to question her, it made sense: the DMBGPoP was first discovered near her cloud, though it was moved when it began living up to its name. Perhaps its first act of magic was to save itself; perhaps Jhudora knew that it knew too much. Of course, to find out I'd have to ask a notoriously touchy Faerie to voluntarily give up some of her secrets, which went about as well as you'd expect.
Jhudora: I have what you really need… magical artifacts of ultimate power!
Me: Thank you for the offer, but what I really need is information.
Jhudora: All right, I'm willing to play along. Bring me a MegaTon Bracelet and we'll talk.
I contemplated the wisdom of helping her for a moment, then decided that it would be worth it to get answers. After all, there was no way she could do anything too evil with just a bracelet, right?
Me: I have it!
Jhudora: About time. Now, what did you want to know?
Me: What do you know about the blue Grundo plushie that used to sit outside your cloud?
Jhudora: That thing? Why would I care about it? I'm just glad that it isn't ruining my view anymore.
Me: So you don't know if it's one of Fyora's plans?
Jhudora: Of course it's not. Stop asking stupid questions.
Me: Could you at least tell me why you're so certain of that?
Jhudora: I've given you more information than that bracelet was worth, and now you're just annoying. I'll tell you this, though: keep asking about that plushie, and I'll make sure you don't annoy anyone ever again. Now get out!
She leaned forward to begin casting a spell, but as I'm not an utter moron, I had gotten a scroll from Illusen to protect myself. I read the scroll hastily, and Jhudora's Bluff faded around me, replaced by my house. Even so, the message had been received. As annoying as a lack of answers is, I'm afraid that's the best I can do for you. I ask that you don't try looking on your own, either; I don't think Jhudora would believe that it wasn't my fault, and I'm not willing to get turned into a Petpet over an article.
But next time you visit the DMBGPoP, take a moment to think about why it's there, maybe even thank it for all it's done for us. You might be able to make it look less sad, if just for a moment.