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A Brynnso Christmas Special


by rielcz

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The following is a script commissioned by Queen Fyora herself due to the increasing demand for more Christmas-themed plays in her tower around this time of year.

By an incredible stroke of luck, Brynn and Hanso – fairly recent additions to the Queen's epic squad of artifact hunters – said, in an interview, that the pair had planned to spend this year's Day of Giving together.

So, Fyora suggested they spend it together on set! And – as no one dares argue with the most magical faerie in Neopia, especially if those Neopets also work under her – the two agreed!

So, without further ado, the "Faerieland Acting Club Representing Years 12-15," sponsored by "The Faerieland Wintertime Society," present, to you, "A Brynnso Christmas Special!"

***

Set: A most holiday-decorated log-cabin style Neohome decked out in multiple colors of garland and tinsel. An entire wall is missing, allowing an audience to peer in. There is a door to the left, for guests to enter and exit. A fireplace sits off to the center-left, its immersive and enthralling glow entertaining the viewers, making them feel the warmth even if they watch from a distance. Atop the mantle are a collection of pine-needles and a few Christmas cards. Off to the other side sits a grandiose Christmas tree, covered in decorations from the star at the top to the trunk at the bottom. There are various presents at the base of it. The lights glow in a most intriguing manner. On the right wall there is a window, snow falling on the other side, making the warmth inside feel all the more cozy.

Christmas themed music plays to serve as an introduction.

The door opens. Inside walks Brynn.

(Crowd applause)

Brynn: (excitedly) Hiya everyone! As if you don't remember, my name is Brynn! It's been a cool one in Neopia this year; so, bundle up! And, if you look under your chairs you should be able to find a set of free wearable mitts and scarves courtesy of The Faerieland Wintertime Society! Stay warm this Christmas season!

(Crowd applause)

A knocking at the door.

Brynn: (confused) Who could that be?

She opens the door. Hanso is revealed.

Hanso: (apologetic) Hey, Brynn, sorry I'm late. I brought you this!

He hands her a snowball.

Brynn: (annoyed) It's a snowball. It'll melt in here!

Hanso: (excitedly) I know! I heard that there'd be no running taps of water on set, so I figured we could melt it if we needed a drink.

Brynn: (further annoyed) But it's a Poison Snowball!

Hanso: (filled with his brand of charismatic innocence) Oh! I did not know that.

He takes the snowball back from her and throws it outside.

(Crowd laughter)

Hanso shuts the door.

Immediately, there is a knocking at it.

Hanso: (alluringly) Now, who could that be?

He opens the door. Lawyerbot is revealed.

Hanso: (surprised) Lawyerbot?!?

Hanso winks to the audience.

Lawyerbot: (mechanically) Yes, it is I, the lover of everything Usuki-oriented, Lawyerbot!

(Crowd applause)

Hanso digs under the Christmas tree and retrieves a gift.

Brynn: (excited) Hey Lawyerbot! I think Hanso has a gift for you!

Lawyerbot: (mechanically) What is it?

Hanso and Brynn in chorus: (exhilarated) It's a new Usuki!

Brynn removes the top of the present to reveal a matching Brynn and Hanso Usuki set contained inside.

Lawyerbot: (mechanically) Gasp.

Brynn: (hysterical) It's a one of a kind Usuki item, Lawyerbot!

Lawyerbot: (mechanically) Yay.

He reaches out his hand to take it.

Hanso grabs the lid from Brynn and snaps it back on the box.

Hanso: (disciplining) No!

Brynn: (happily) Well, not yet! Sing a song for us first!

(Crowd chants, "Sing a song, sing a song!")

Lawyerbot: (mechanically) Okay, fine, I will sing.

(Crowd applause)

Lawyerbot: (mechanically) Oh, I love the Christmas Season / Must I really state a reason? / Just the promise of new Usukis / Should be reason enough / Oh, I love the Christmas Season / Is that really such treason? / I'll never stop loving this time of year / 'Cause Usukis – I'll never get enough.

Lawyerbot sings 17 more verses.

(Uncertain crowd applause)

Brynn: (tired) Wow! That sure was... interesting.

Hanso: (feigning excitement) Oh, indeed!

Lawyerbot: (mechanically) Can I have the Usuki now?

Brynn throws it outside. Lawyerbot chases after it. Hanso quickly locks the door.

Hanso: (exasperated) I'm glad he's gone.

(Crowd applause)

There is a knock at the door.

Brynn: (hesitantly) Are you Lawyerbot?

Voice on other side: No.

Hanso opens the door. The being stays outside, their identity uncertain.

Hanso: (merrily) Well, come on in then!

Linae walks in.

Brynn: (excited) Kou-Jong sensation Linae from the Cyodrakes Gaze?

(Crowd applause)

Linae: (returning Brynn's excitement) Yep! It's me! Hi Hanso!

Linae waves at Hanso.

Hanso: (casually) Hey, Linae! How're ya doing?

Linae: (happily) I'm doing fine, thanks. How's Brynn?

Hanso: (filled with his brand of charismatic innocence) Oh, as pushy–I mean, as... perfect, as always!

Hanso smiles nervously at Brynn. At first, Brynn looks cross, but quickly she smiles at his childlike behavior.

(Crowd "aww!")

Hanso: (casually) So, how's Hoban?

Linae: (laughing) As imbalanced as always.

(Crowd laughter)

Brynn digs under the Christmas tree and retrieves a gift.

Brynn: (merrily) We've got a present for you!

Linae: (surprised) Really? What is it?

Brynn: (building up tension) We'll show you... if you'll show us, and the crowd, some form of amazing feat!

Linae: (blushing) Oh, I don't think I could–

Hanso: (excitedly) Come on, Linae, show us something cool!

(Crowd chants, "Do something! Do something!")

Linae: (smiling) Oh, alright, I guess I could do something.

Linae takes out some Kou-Jong tiles and attempts to juggle them. Upon each piece crashing to the ground, she decides to sing.

Linae: (singing an epic soprano) Well it's Christmas time, it's Christmas time / It's time for joy and... play! / So go out now, grab some Kou-Jong tiles / And puzzle your mind... today! / Yeah, yeah!!!

Unable to think of anything else, she stops.

(Uncertain crowd applause)

Hanso: (grinning) See, I knew you could do something... cool!

Brynn: (sarcastically) It was better than Lawyerbot, anyway.

(Crowd laughter)

Off-stage, the characteristic, "Ba-dum-tiss" from the drums is heard.

Hanso: (confused) Where did that come from?

Someone off-stage: (shouting) We're the band!

Hanso: (increasingly confused) We have a band?

Someone off-stage: (shouting) Of course you do! Who do you think plays the intros and outros?

Linae: (mock accusingly) Yeah, Hanso?

Hanso: (on the spot) Er... Dr. Sloth?

Linae and Brynn in Chorus: (innocently) *sigh* Oh, Hanso!

(Crowd laughter and hooting)

Linae: (expectantly) So, what did you guys get me?

Hanso opens the box, revealing a set of Kou-Jong tiles.

Hanso: (majestically) It's a set of Brynnso-themed Kou-Jong tiles! See?

He picks one up and holds it to her face.

Hanso: (excitedly) See? This one has a picture of my face on it, looking happy!

He picks up another and holds it to her face.

Hanso: (excitedly) And look here! This one has a picture of my face on it, looking sad!

Real-life Hanso tries to mirror the expression the picture on the tile has.

Brynn: (jealous) I'm sure there are tiles containing pictures other than you in there...

Hanso: (casually) Of course!

Hanso rifles through the box. He picks up a tile.

Hanso: (matter-of-factly) Here! This has Xandra's crazy face on it!

(Crowd laughter)

Linae and Brynn in Chorus: (shaking their heads) Oh, Hanso...

Linae: (merrily) Well, it's probably time I get going.

Hanso puts back the tiles he took and gives her the container.

Linae: (contentedly) Aw, thanks for all the fun, guys!

Linae gives the pair a hug.

Linae: (majestically) Goodbye, great audience!

Linae leaves as she waves goodbye.

(Crowd applause)

Hanso closes the door.

Immediately, there is a knock at the door.

Hanso: (exasperated) Really, more visitors?

Hanso goes to open the door.

Chadley and Abigail enter.

Chadley: (pretentiously) Hey, Neopia, it's good to be back in the limelight!

Chadley waves to the crowd.

(Crowd applause and hooting)

Brynn: (casually) Hey, it's the Daily Dare sensation themselves!

Hanso: (filled with his brand of charismatic innocence) You mean Chadley and the other one?

Abigail frowns with resentment.

Off-stage, the characteristic, "Ba-dum-tiss" from the drums is heard.

Brynn: (annoyed) Yes, the other one being sweet little Abigail.

Abigail grins.

Abigail: (muttering) Chadley, my last public appearance with you was... not the best. Make this second chance I gave you worthwhile.

Hanso: (mock accusingly) Yeah, Chadley, make it worthwhile!

Chadley: (feigning shock) You're completely right! Hosting a gaming event with Abigail was totally not my style.

Abigail: (excited) So, maybe you won't do it again next year?

Chadley: (laughing) What, are you daft? I'm pushing to host next year totally solo, YOLO.

Off-stage, the characteristic, "Ba-dum-tiss" from the drums is heard.

(Crowd applause)

Abigail releases an exasperated sigh.

Abigail: (innocently) Or, you could go down to the desert and... insult Jazan on his hair, or something.

Hanso: (mock accusingly) Look, I'm the only one around here with the authority to tease Jazan.

Chadley: (matter-of-factly) Look, we can all tease Jazan!

(Crowd laughter)

Hanso: (shocked) Oh my employer, you're right!

Hanso turns and faces the audience.

Hanso: (merrily) We can all tease Jazan!

(Crowd commences into random chatter about Jazan's less than redeeming qualities)

A minute later, Brynn takes center set.

Brynn: (calming) OK, that's enough. Abigail, is there anything you'd like to say?

Abigail: (emphatically) AAA's game from Camp Wannamakeagame is in stores just in time for this Christmas season! Buy today!

Abigail smiles unnervingly.

(Nervous crowd applause)

Chadley: Shameless self-advertising, much.

Brynn retrieves two presents from underneath the tree. She hands them to Hanso.

Hanso: Before I give you both your presents, do one last epic thing here on the Faerieland Wintertime Society set!

Chadley looks at Abigail and grins.

Abigail frowns.

(Crowd chants, "Make epicness! Do something epic!")

Chadley: (alluringly) Come on, Chadley LUVR Club Member #2 – Abigail – second only to me.

Abigail: (upset) I thought I quit.

Chadley: (ominously) You can never leave.

Chadley grins.

Abigail: (shrugging) You know what? Fine. I'm game for a last epic thing.

Abigail smiles.

Chadley: (singing tenor) Oh... my name is Chadley.

Abigail: (muttering) This isn't what I had in mind.

Hanso shrugs.

Abigail: (singing alto) And I am Abigail.

Chadley: (taking an upward swing) I really like me!

Abigail: (moving downward stepwise) Oh it... never fails.

Chadley: (taking the upward swing further) My lyrics are so epic!

Abigail: (staying at a steady pitch) And mine are... adequate!

Chadley: (almost whispering) They'll blow your mind – you'll need a medic!

Abigail: (matching Chadley's upward swing) And mine just... barely fit!

Chadley commences beat-boxing.

(Crowd chants "Go Chadley! Go Chadley!")

Off-stage, the band plays some melody in time to Chadley's beat-boxing.

Abigail looks at him, absolutely stunned.

Chadley finishes.

(Crowd cheering and hooting)

Abigail: (contentedly) I'll admit, Chadley... this went better than I thought it would go.

Chadley grins.

Chadley: (innocently) Thanks, #2.

Abigail looks at Chadley resentfully.

(Crowd laughter)

Hanso: (excitedly) Yay!

Hanso opens the gifts, revealing a pair of matching Daily Dare Y15 sweaters featuring Chadley and Abigail. The logo of the Faerieland Wintertime Society is stitched on the back, Brynn and Hanso's figures and signatures accompanying.

Brynn: (excitedly) Now you can always remember past fun and good friends while hopefully not shivering in the cold!

Abigail: (feigning excitement) Oh, wow! Now I can always have some picture of Chadley on me.

Chadley: (grinning) Oh, wow! Now I can always have some picture of me on me!

(Crowd applause)

Chadley: (matter-of-factly) Well, I think it's time for me to be going. I have a massage scheduled soon.

(Crowd "aw!")

Chadley: (apologetic) As sad as it is...

Abigail: (merrily) It's time I go too.

The crowd is silent. Off-stage, the band makes a noise like a cricket.

Abigail clenches her jaw and pulls Chadley's collar.

Abigail: (gritting her teeth) Let's go, Chadley.

Chadley: (frightened) Hey! Watch my charisma!

Abigail and Chadley exit.

(Crowd applause)

Hanso closes the door.

Hanso: (amazed) Now, there goes someone with more charm than I have!

Brynn: (alluringly) But, unlike you, he doesn't have me for his best friend.

Brynn smiles.

(Crowd "aww!")

There is a knocking at the door.

Hanso: (muttering) Darn, I should just never close that thing.

(Crowd laughter)

Hanso goes to open the door.

King Hagan, dressed in a red and white costume, is revealed.

(Crowd applause)

Hanso: (emphatic) Santa Skeith?!?

(Crowd laughter)

Hagan: (groaning) They tell me to get into the Christmas spirit, and I'm instantly mistaken for a non-existent bearer of gifts!

Hanso: (heartbroken) You mean Santa Skeith doesn't exist?

Brynn looks at Hagan accusingly.

Hagan: (apologetic) Er, no! He's... real.

(Crowd laughter)

Hanso: (smiling) And you're him?

Brynn continues to look at Hagan accusingly. She narrows her eyes.

Hagan pulls Brynn aside.

Hagan: (whispering) Alright, fine Brynn – you served my army well and I guess I can do this for you.

Brynn: (smiling) Thanks, King.

Hagan and Brynn return to the main part of the set with Hanso.

Hagan: (sighing) Oh, sure, why not – I'm Santa Skeith. Ho, ho, ho!

(Crowd applause and hooting)

Hanso: (expectantly) So, are you going to give us presents?

Hagan: (confused) Er... well, I was told I was going to get a gift and I've nothing prepared but...

Hanso immediately grabs Hagan's present out from underneath the Christmas tree and hands it to "Santa Skeith".

Hanso: (smiling) Here you go Santa Skeith! Now, for my present...

Hanso smiles and stares at Hagan almost menacingly.

Hagan: (thinking on his feet) Er... how about some poetry, Hanso! You've been a good... er, artifact hunter this year, and you deserve it!

Hanso looks ridiculously excited.

Hanso: (cantabile) But only if you sing the poem...

Hagan: (distraught) Really?

Hanso nods his head vigorously.

Hagan looks at Brynn pleadingly, though Brynn stares him down.

Hagan: (sighing) Alright fine.

Hanso: (excitedly) Yay!

Hagan: (singing bass) I was at this set one fine evening / And the Ixi there made me sing / And so I must now commence the chore / Or Brynn will go and make me feel sore.

Unable to think of anything else, he stops.

(Uncertain crowd applause)

Hanso: (in tears) That was the greatest thing ever, Santa!

Hanso puts down the present and throws his arms around the Skeith.

Brynn: (jealous) Er, Hanso, I think that I should be involved in some way.

Hanso: (smiling) Oh, sure, Brynn. Why don't you go give Santa his gift? It's on the floor.

Off-stage, the characteristic, "Ba-dum-tiss" from the drums is heard.

(Crowd laughter)

Hanso releases his grip on Hagan.

Hagan: (expectantly) Yes. Now, where's my gift!

Brynn lifts the lid off the box and reveals its contents. Inside, there is a poorly assembled stained glass window featuring Brynn.

Brynn: (happily) Now, whenever you're lonely in your castle, you can look at this window and think of me! I made it myself!

Hagan just stares at it.

Brynn: (muttering) Take that Hanso, and your stupid tiles.

Hagan: (feigning excitement) Oh, no amount of singing... is worth this.

Brynn: (excited) So you like it?

Hagan just stares at her.

Brynn smiles back expectantly.

Hagan: (exasperated) I'm going to bed.

He takes the gift and leaves.

(Crowd laughter)

Brynn: (excited) Well, everyone, that about brings us to the end of the Christmas special!

Hanso: (happily) Yep! I hope you had fun and–

A knocking at the door interrupts his speech.

Hanso: (frightened) But, I didn't even close the door this t–

Fyora herself steps through the door.

(Crowd applause)

Fyora: (majestically) It was faerie magic that allowed me to replicate the sound of someone knocking on the door.

Hanso: (matter-of-factly) I think you mean Christmas magic.

He winks at Brynn.

Brynn sighs.

Fyora: (confused) Er... fine, I guess.

Fyora smiles.

Fyora: (happily) I just came to tell you both about the impending visit of three ghosts... in future Neopia, anyway. But, for now they – and two other special guests – are alive.

(Crowd laughter and hooting)

Hanso and Brynn in Chorus: (innocently) Oh, Fyora!

Hanso: (pondering) Hmm... do you mean Lawyerbot, Linae, Chadley, Abigail, and Santa Skeith?

Fyora: (confused) Santa Skeith?

Brynn: (laughing) It's a long story...

Fyora: (nonchalant) Anyway, how did you know?

Hanso: (coolly) They've already come here.

Fyora: (relieved) Oh, good, that means I've missed them.

(Crowd laughter)

Fyora: (happily) Well, I guess that leaves only one thing to do now...

Hanso: (nervously) You mean singing?

Fyora laughs.

Fyora: (smiling) Oh, for Fyora's sake, no. Do you know how terrible the singing is in Christmas specials?

Hanso and Brynn in chorus: (sighing) Yes.

(Crowd laughter)

Hanso: (confused) So, what's the one thing we still have to do?

Fyora: (majestically) We have to thank the audience!

(Crowd applause)

Brynn: (excitedly) Yep! Well that about brings us to the end of the first annual Brynnso Christmas Special!

Hanso: (confused) Wait, there'll be another one next year?

Fyora uses her staff to make a White Weewoo appear. She points to it.

Fyora: (alluringly) Well, we'll see how well this one is received.

(Crowd laughter)

The Weewoo disappears.

Brynn: (excitedly) So, on behalf of Hanso, Fyora, all the guests we had this evening, and The Faerieland Wintertime Society... Good night, Neopia, and have a great Christmas!

All the guests get back on stage and wave to the crowd.

Christmas themed music plays to serve as an outro.

***

The preceding was "A Brynnso Christmas Special!"

On behalf of the Faerieland Wintertime Society, we hope you enjoyed it.

The End

 
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