Questioning the Coconut Shy Quiggle
Welcome back, everybody! Today I am here to bring you an interview with a very elusive Neopian, in fact, so elusive that we do not really even know his real name. Today, I'm here to talk with the Coconut Shy Quiggle. Like many of the other subjects of my interviews, this Quiggle has gotten a pretty bad reputation over the years so I have invited him to talk with me and help change everyone's opinions of him. So without further ado, here is a transcript of what happened:
"Hello! I always like to start out my interviews by having my subject go on the record about their name; could you tell me and my readers what you name is?" I ask, curious about how he will answer.
"I, uh... You can just call me 'The Quiggle'," replies the Quiggle nervously.
"What do you mean? Surely you have a name?" I ask, getting more curious by the minute.
"Well, let's just say that the place I was at before I set up shop at the deserted fairgrounds, well... those people are probably happy I'm gone. I, uh, may have led some Neopians to believe they had a chance at a game I was running when they, uh, didn't..." says the Quiggle, nervously grinning.
"Alright. Well, speaking of that, what do you have to say about some people who claim that your Coconut Shy game is rigged?" I ask, taking an opportunity where I saw it.
"Of course it's not rigged! There's a chance Eliv Thade isn't really insane is there not? It's the same with my game. Sometimes people win, sometimes people lose, and sometimes Eliv Thade isn't really as crazy as everyone says he is," replies the Quiggle, in a matter of fact voice.
"Actually, Eliv is pretty insane, not to mention, I'm pretty sure comparing your game to Eliv Thade's insanity is like comparing apples to oranges..." I reply, but before I can finish, the Quiggle interrupts.
"Nonsense! My game's not rigged, and what's with all this talk of apples, it's like you are channeling Bart from the apple bobbing station or something. Next question!" says the Quiggle, starting to get a little angry. Not wanting to spoil my interview with the Quiggle, I decide to accept his analogy and move on to more questions.
"Alright, well, can you tell my readers about the avatar that your game gives out? Is there any way that people can increase their odds?" I ask, hoping to give Neopians a glimmer of hope that they can get an otherwise elusive avatar.
"Well, I will tell you right now, there is definitely no way to increase your odds at my game. For instance, paying me some neopoints on the side would definitely not increase your odds. Oh! And I definitely do not accept Halloween Paint Brushes, not ever," replies the Quiggle with a grin on his face.
Confused by his reply, I ask, "Wait. So are you saying that there is a way to increase our odds? Or there is not?"
"Oh, you can definitely not increase your odds by leaving Bottled Faeries behind the stall when no one is around; that would definitely never work!" replies the Quiggle, with a wink.
"That is not really what I asked you. You're kind of giving me a shifty answer..." I reply in a loud, accusing voice, but before I can finish my line of thinking, the Quiggle interrupts again.
"Hmm? I'm sorry, dear, but you're mumbling and it is really starting to bum me out. Can you ask me another question?" chimes the Quiggle, acting as curious and evasive as ever. Not really sure what to say, I decide to give up this question as well.
"Okay. Would you mind answering some fan questions?" I ask, hoping that I will be able to get something out of the Quiggle.
"Sure!" replies the Quiggle, enthusiastically.
"Okay! One of my fans would like to know, do you have a favorite carnival game? If so, why?" I ask, hoping the easy question helps bring him out of his secretive shell.
"Sure! I love playing the Carnival of Terror; it reminds me of my beloved Coconut Shy game. Actually, I happen to have a high score of 10,000 points on that game!" says the Quiggle in a boastful tone.
"Um, I am pretty sure that's not possible. Most people can't get over 1,000. Are you sure?" I ask the Quiggle.
"Mmm... not the way that I play it!" says the Quiggle cryptically while winking at me.
"Wait, what does that..." I reply, very confused, but before I can say anything else, the Quiggle interrupts me yet again.
"What's that? You're mumbling again. You should ask me another question!" declares the Quiggle. Not wanting to start a fight with this hard to pin down Quiggle, I back off this question as well.
"Okay, well, another one of my fans would like to know: do you know Bart, the Gnorbu that runs the apple bobbing station?" I ask, hoping to finally get a straight answer with such an easy question.
"Oh," says the Quiggle, nervously playing with his hair, "I definitely do not know anything about what is under that hat of his, no sir, in fact, I definitely do not even know who he is come to think of it! Yeah, that's right; I definitely don't know who that is." It definitely seemed like the Quiggle was trying to hide something, maybe even something about his dark and mysterious past. However, for the purposes of this interview, I decided that I was going to keep it as cheery and optimistic as possible.
"Okay, if you say so!" I reply, "However, I have another question for you. There have been some reports of seeing Ollie, the orange shirt guy around your booth. Are you friends with Ollie?"
"You know what? That is a good question! I have never seen Ollie before but every time I rub my eyes, people look shocked afterwards and ask me if I saw an orange shirted fellow pop out of nowhere. Of course, I didn't though, because I close my eyes when I rub them," replies the Quiggle, for once, a little confused himself.
"Alright! That is a fair answer. So, is there anything else that you care to tell my readers that you think might boost your image?" I ask, hoping to wrap up the interview.
"Uhh... yeah! Your readers... they should know..." replied the Quiggle, almost like he was making it up as he went, "they should definitely know that... every time, every time they knock down a coconut, I will release a faerie from its bottle! Yeah! That sounds right! I will release a faerie from its bottle!" Not really sure whether I wanted to believe the Quiggle or not, I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. I told him that I thought that was enough for the interview and thanked him for his time. When I walked away, I thought I heard him mumbling something about what a crazy idea it was to release faeries, but I'm sure I misheard him.
Well, there you have it, folks! You just read my exclusive interview with 'the Quiggle' himself. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed giving the interview. Even if we cannot take everything that the Quiggle says at face value, I would like to think that he releases faeries from their bottles every once in a while, and if that's not enough to get you to play his game, I don't know what would be! Well, that's all for now.