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Why The South Pole Should Be Neopia's Next Land


by a_greenparrot

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Neopians are always expanding into new lands as time goes by. It seems like just yesterday when Neopia only had one side, but today explorers have discovered wonderful new worlds like Shenkuu and Altador. Just lately Roxton Colchester went on the journey of a lifetime to bring us Moltara. However, there is one land that just cannot be ignored any longer. Even the oldest of maps showed that at the south-most point of Neopia is a land of ice. Yet no explorer has journeyed to see what is hidden in this frigid world. No Neopians have gone forth to build homes and open shops at the South Pole. Well, it's time for a change.

Of course, the South Pole does have one famous inhabitant already. The psycho Krawk bent on world domination, Lady Frostbite. But don't let her scare you off yet. She hasn't really conquered anything yet, now has she? She may threaten to turn us all into popsicles, but I haven't seen one case of popsiclization to date. Seeing as how she lives in isolation, it's quite likely that she simply hasn't had any chances to find any victims. But we won't know what she's truly capable of until we pay her a visit.

Now that that's out of the way, let's look at some of the positive aspects of the South Pole. Every land has something that draws visitors in every day. For Virtupets it's all the wonderful technology to experience; for Mystery Island it's all the ruins left from an ancient civilization. And what does the South Pole have to offer? Why, it's got the largest supply of snow you'll ever see. Sure, sure, we've got snow on Terror Mountain, but up on that mountain there's always some houses or trees or monstrous Snowickle in the way. At the South Pole, it's quality snow with nothing at all obstructing the perfectly white fields.

And with this snow there is an endless pool of possibilities. Just think of what you could build with all this snow. Your snowman be wouldn't some dinky little body that'll just melt in a couple of days. Oh no, with this much snow, you could build a colossus sixty feet up in the air. With this comes the opportunity for all sorts of games. Like the snowman building game, a game where you build a colossus sixty feet up in the air. Granted building something that enormous would take weeks at the least and there's always the risk of frostbite, but all great achievements require some sort of sacrifice.

The massive snowmen are only the first step, though. Shops will make millions when they market their own brand of snow collected straight from the South Pole. There's be just the brand for everyone: extra white for the neat freaks, extra cold for the ghouls, or extra animated for those with NeoCash. Yes, once the stores start pop up, this place will be bustling. Everyone will rush to fill up on their favorite types of snow; the stores will sell out in a blink of an eye, but the beauty part is that there'll always be more snow to restock.

Now, some people might find all the white a bit plain, but that can be easily remedied. With a few touches from the other corners of Neopia, you'll have a real rainbow of culture. All you need to do is bring in a few plants from here and there. Perhaps a vine from Shenkuu and some trees from Krawk Island. Once they're planted, the cold will immediately kill them. Haven't you always wanted to see what all these plants would look like all limp and shriveled? Well, now you can, all thank to the miracle of the South Pole.

Furthermore, not all of the buildings need to be your basic igloo. Architects today are very skilled and would be able to come up with all sorts of unique designs. Like, how about the square igloo? Ooh, I bet you haven't seen something that crazy before. And once you get inside, there's an assortment of choices for customization. Your furniture can be made from snow, ice, or some half-melted blend of both of them. I can honestly say that there will be the igloo for everyone.

Now let's talk about the residents who already inhabit the land. I am of course speaking of the Darblats. While many of them are servants to the (yet to be proven) menace to society, Lady Frostbite, there are still quite a few who have no affiliation with her. These little guys are just loads of fun to be around. You can spend hours watch them wandering about in the same circle saying nothing but, "Blat blat," over and over again. And it's not hard to find them; you can't take five steps without tripping over one and landing in the freezing snow. Even if you don't want to be with them, they will always find you. Also, Darblats don't even sleep so don't expect to get a break from them while you sleep. You'd think that it would get annoying after the 15,726th "Blat," but they're just so lovable that the thought of complete hatred never crosses your mind.

There are quite a few notable Darblats living in the society. Darblatty the Darblat is a hilarious stand-up comedian who does the same routine every Thursday. You will never get tired of his "Blat blat" jokes. No matter how many times you hear them, you'll break into hysterics. And then there's Darblatta the Darblat who is a real diva singer. Her chart-topping smash, "Blat blat" will have you foot-tapping and finger snapping for all 27 minutes of it. All they need is for new tourists to really get a chance to break out internationally.

It might just be endless amounts of snow and clueless Darblats right now, but once the snowball (see what I did there?) gets rolling there's no stopping it. The snow industry is going to catch on big and soon everyone and their Meowclops will be flooding to the shops to get their share. The Darblats are headed for a big boom in the Neopian community. They may even take over the Weewoo's job as icon for the Neopian Times. Or perhaps they'll get their own paper, The South Polian Times.

From there it can only get bigger and bigger. The Altador Cup will not be prepared for the South Pole team, made up entirely of Darblats. The new South Pole Habitariums will give your petpetpets something completely new. And did someone say 'South Pole Plot?'

So get the movement started today! All we need to start is a few dedicated Neopians who can withstand freezing weather, incessant petpets, and a maniac who threatens to destroy anyone who dares to even step on her land. Once the volunteers arrive for their thankless chore, we'll soon have igloos for people to move in. And if you have any doubts, just keep reminding yourself, they have snow.

 
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