Neopia's Fill-in-the-blank News Source Circulation: 182,995,662 Issue: 470 | 19th day of Storing, Y12
Home | Archives Articles | Editorial | Short Stories | Comics | New Series | Continued Series

The Top 10 Cheapest and Healthiest Neopian Foods!

by moondog1997


Well, hello! *walks over to shake your hand, slips, and smacks you on the face by accident*

Oh, erm... Sorry about that. I’m a tad klutzy. It runs in my family, you wouldn’t BELIEVE what my Uncle Buster used to – sorry. ON TO BUSINESS! I get sidetracked easily. Isn’t that funny? My cousin Tim used to tell me --

*you poke me*

Okay, anyway, my name is Moondog, trainee Neopian Times Reporter, and today we’re doing a bit of digging on just what Neopians think about the long-controversial ‘free food’ issue. According to the majority of the Neopian populace, foods such omelettes, jellies, etc., are considered to be not only distinctly un-yummy, but also low-class and cheap.

Just listen to what a certain Blue Moehog named Cliff thought about the issue: “What kind of a loser would need to eat omelettes? I mean, unless they’re poor. I, for one, only eat food that’s royal blue and has horns—” At this point he was interrupted by someone who was DEFINITELY NOT ME tripping over a stray piece of cheese and sending an armload of Ferocious Neggs soaring into his face, whereupon he declined to comment further. I’m sure, however, that my readers heard most of his opinion on the issue, which brings me to my next point: Why does no one like free foods?

If my pets love anything, they love an omelette smothered with bacon and cheese and broccoli and onions when they stumble out of bed in the morning, and who doesn’t like saving a few extra Neopoints on food now and then? Those users with more than one or two pets will agree that food can be expensive, and there are so many ways to get free food that sometimes it’s not necessary to pay for any at all!

With that, here is my list of the top five Neopian foods that can be attained for 0 Neopoints and will provide your pet with a healthy and balanced diet.

5. Fish! It may look dull sitting in your Inventory, but fish is among the very healthiest foods to feed your Neopet.

Benefits: Fish provides good vitamins and minerals, and the oils it carries assist in making your pet’s coat shiny and soft. It doesn’t hurt that it’s extremely tasty, and goes quite well with Brown Sauce (another 0 Neopoint item that can be won from the Tombola on Mystery Island).

Where to find it: Take your pet fishing! The Underwater Fishing Cavern in the Ruins of Maraqua is the only place in Neopia you can take your pet for a few hours of sitting around catching delightful fishies. You may have to be patient, but you will eventually reel in some fresh, tasty fish (or maybe another surprise!)

4. Jelly. Now, wait a minute! Don’t say it! I know what you’re thinking... Jelly? How can that be good for you? Well, after a lot of research, I have discovered the actual source that delicious fruity mass comes from *Jelly World does NOT exist*, and I can provide a lot of information as to its nutritional value.

Benefits: You may not know this, but every jelly, besides perhaps the Poisonous and Dung varieties, is made from real fruit puree and is just as healthy as the fruit itself! Vitamins, tastiness, and affordability all rolled in to one deliciously wobbly piece of squashy goodness!

Where to find it: If you are one of those lucky Neopians who know where to find this yummy free food *wink* then I don’t need to tell you. However, for those of you who don’t know where its source is, suffice it to say that many people who don’t find jelly desirable donate it to the Money Tree, and it’s always in abundance there. Free jelly for everyone!

3. NeoCrackers. These crackers are far more healthy than most people assume, and are as priceless as, erm... Something without a price! ;)

Benefits: Your average NeoCrackers are super tasty, crunchy and satisfying, but they’re also made from healthy grains grown in Meridell, so they are quite good for you. Now, NeoCrackers can also be rather salty, but that makes them all the better for water-dwelling pets such as Lutaris, Kikos, Flotsams and Jetsams, who need more salt than most pets (the fish option might not work as well for water Neopets, heheh).

Where to find it: NeoCrackers are one of the ‘consolation’ prizes that can be received from incorrectly guessing the answer to the question at the Lunar Chart. To get to the Lunar Chart, take a trip to Shenkuu and visit a certain Wise Old Gnorbu who lives there. First you may want to study up on your Neopian astronomy, though. ;)

2. Altadorian Bread: No bread has ever been better for you!

Benefits: Altadorian Bread is fluffy, light, and fills you up wonderfully without making you bloaty. (Good news, Dieter the Polarchuck!) In addition, somehow those clever Altadorian bakers figured out how to make it with all kinds of nice vitamins. Soup’s on!

Where to find it: Similar to Jelly, I can’t disclose its location. It is also plentiful at the Money Tree, though!

And now, Quiggles and Scorchios, Kaus and Yurbles, your most affordable and healthy Neopian food!

1. Omelettes: Ah, I love the smell of controversial food in the morning... *cough* Anywho, back to business - this food probably has the worst reputation in Neopia, but there isn’t really any reason for it. Omelettes are very satisfying as a breakfast food, and to add to their value, they can feed a pet for a full three meals! That’s why it’s my number one pick for the healthiest and most affordable food in Neopia.

Benefits: Egg of any kind is good for you, and this is no exception. Omelettes are stuffed with vitamins and protein, just the thing to get you going! I’m aware that some of them come stuffed full of bacon, but others come liberally sprinkled with carrots and peas! Carnivorous Neopets need more meat anyway, though, so save up the Bacon Omelettes for your Grarrls and Skeiths... or yourself. :D

Where to find it: To get yourself a *literally* sun-baked slice of gooey omelette, skip on down to Tyrannia and visit the Plateau. An unknown, unidentified giant fanged monster (rumored to be a giant seal named Lou) comes there daily and lays an egg – don’t worry, it isn’t poisonous or green or anything – and each day, the egg cracks open and cooks in the sweltering Tyrannian sun to make enough omelette for every Neopian to take one slice a day. Thanks, sweet little giant fanged monster!

Well, that’s a humble Moondog’s opinion on free food and nommies. I hope you enjoyed yourself! Happy eating! *waves at you while turning around and whacks innocent passerby in the stomach*


Search the Neopian Times

Great stories!


A Story in Which the Title Was Eaten by a Lupe
Mr. Grundo put on the hat and ambled over to the mirror. It was a very jaunty hat. He liked it.

Also by esperonza14

by crazy_holly_ii


Ties That Bind: Part Five
Today wasn't as promising as it seemed.

by merlynia


Illusions of Grandeur: Part Four
"I hope you did not stay up too late, Gianni." Katrina's voice was gently chastising. "Your mother expects you to be presentable and sociable during the ball."

by kittengriffin


Scarlet Shadow - A Thief's Uprising: Part Three
"You're not a Scarab. Not yet, at least," Cenoal continued. "No one's going to take you seriously until..."

by kathleen_kate

Submit your stories, articles, and comics using the new submission form.