A Yurble stole my cinnamon roll! Circulation: 174,878,201 Issue: 412 | 2nd day of Collecting, Y11
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A Yurble's Hunger

by 06dknibbs


It was that time again... feeding time.

     "HEY! Yurble Knibbs!" my owner (Or 06 as I like to call him) called.

     It had been three whole days since I last sat down with some grub. I often thought, 'Honestly, why can't he just remember every day! And what's with all the omelettes and the none existent thin air he calls Jelly. It couldn't hurt to visit the Kelp once in a while or pay a visit to the food store.' Well, I had had enough.

     I sat down in my bed that night but just couldn't sleep so I stood up and walked over to Xwetoky (You heard um... read right. He gets a nickname other than Xwetoky Knibbs, not me). He never sleeps anymore; in fact he doesn't do anything... not since his mass exposure to the machine (Lab ray? I think it's called) 06 takes him to every day. He just sits there and acts all crazy.

     "Dung rabbits!" he cried out as soon as I sat down.

     "Dung rabbits?" I decided to question. This was always the fun part.

     "Dung rabbits want to be painted zombies so they can eat your braaaaaiiinnzzz! Hihihihihihihiii!"

     "Um yeah..." I said to myself. Anyway, I decided to ask him the question that had been bugging me all day. "Hey, Xwetoky? Do you like omelette?"

     "Omelette...?" This was followed by a ten second pause... "Omelette will help bad man sloth go crazy and explodify three whole centimetres of Jelly World! Wheeeee! Boom!"

     “Never mind... Never mind..."

     At this point I stood up and left. You could never get a straight answer out of the poor guy anymore.

     It was then my decision was final! If I was to have any dignity (or taste buds) left in my future then I would have to make 06 change his ways or get myself some proper food. The second option was easier.

     I set off on the road in search of something that would be both edible and tasty. It wasn’t long before I came along a place called the Trading Post. Things for trade! There had to be some food here! And there was. Looking around, I discovered Happy Anniversary Neggs, Bananarific Ice Lollys; in fact, there were infinite rows of glorious snacks and meals. The trouble was all this food was too expensive. I tried to offer my savings of 500 NP, but got told to go somewhere else if I wasn't going to be reasonable. This put me down a lot... slowly I made my way to the exit and made a quick note never to come here again.

     Feeling rather sad, I slowly began to walk back when what should I see!? A giant cooking pot spread out before me! Beside it was a kind faerie.

     People seemed to be placing items in this pot and getting food in return. I felt rather happy with this and decided to place my Ummagine and my Bagguss (both freebies from my owner again... grr...) into the pot to see if I could finally sink my teeth into something that wouldn't make me want to sit down and cry. So I walked over and was very kindly greeted by the faerie who introduced herself as Jhuidah. She told me I should place some items in the pot to see if I could make some guy called Pango Pango happy? I didn't want to feed someone else! I wanted to feed me! Well, I went along with it anyway, because I had seen all those other pets do the same. I walked closer and quite happily dropped in my two items and waited in excitement...

     Five seconds later and nothing. Was it supposed to take this long...? Suddenly I heard a loud roar! Jhuidah turned to me and told me Pango Pango wasn't happy. She paused and gave me my items back and then because she felt sorry for me, I received a piece of omelette. This really made me annoyed!


     Two seconds later I now had a lifetime ban from the cooking pot.

     I decided that perhaps my journey's purpose wasn't really worthwhile. Maybe I would just have to accept my diet as it was... Xwetoky, Pteri Knibbs and Shoyru Knibbs never complained. Then again, you already know how Xwetoky is and Pteri and Shoyru like to talk to each other... apparently you need "Real Wings" to be popular. Not just another freebie from the advent calendar. Why was my life so cruel? I set myself one last task!

     I slowly made my way to Neopia Central. It was nearly morning and my owner was probably getting ready to hand me eighteen items that cost absolutely nothing, so I had to be quick. Once I arrived, I made my way to the kadoatery. This was my best plan yet! I chewed away at the lock on the first cage until it sprang open... It was only then I saw the bowl of keys, but that doesn't matter. Supercat (the Kadoatie) immediately leapt out so I made my way inside. The trick now was to blend in. Of course, as I was a Yurble, no one would ever feed me at a place like this. So I had to think fast! Then I had a brilliant idea! Climbing out of the cage, I grabbed a pen and made my way up to the top. Then I crossed out the name Kadoatery and wrote Yurbleoatery. Now I could stay here forever and eat whatever I liked. Neopians would come to feed me from all over to be generous or to get that nice shiny trophy and nothing could stop me!

     "Alright! Come on, you lot!"

     This wasn't right. I looked around. A Neopian was here, all right, but he was definitely not what I thought.

     "You’ve been here um... 21 minutes now, so I’m bringing out the new Kads."

     NEW! Nobody told me this place switched over! I just thought they changed the name plates. What's more, this Kad keeper was sure to tell my owner if I got caught. To make things worse, my owner was going to wake up any minute now! If he found me missing, I wouldn't be fed for a year! Eating freebies is much much better than eating nothing. There was only one thing left to do...

     RUN! I leapt from the cage and ran as fast as my little Yurble legs could carry me! I couldn't stop now! I had to get back! I was hungry, in trouble, and I was nearly home! There! Over the hill! My owner's Neohome was in sight but I could see him through the window. Was he looking for me?

     SLAM! I shut the door a little too loudly. My plan of sneaking back to bed was ruined. 06 walked into the hallway...

     "I'm sorry!! I shouldn't have ran away, but I was sooo hungry!! I wanted proper foooooodddd!!!"

     06 seemed oblivious to my tears... In fact I don't think he listened to a word I said. He replied with, "There you are... I baked you a cake. ^^"

     A cake... was he serious! Apparently so...

     Walking into the kitchen I saw what seemed to be a gigantic hill wrapped in tinfoil. My guess, the cake was underneath it. 06 finally removed the shining blanket, slowly though. He seemed very happy with himself. I was too! Finally! I was about to taste something different! Something new! And then...

     "What is that!!?" I asked.

     "Omelette surprise! :D" Obviously he would be doing that gaping smile he does when he's proud.

     Before me stood a massive tower of omelette on top of omelette! This was probably the worst time to come upon this after spending all that time hunting for anything but this!

     All I could do was shout, "AARRGGHH!!"

The End

A notice from Xwetoky: Please come up with your own ending if you want to believe Yurble Knibbs does not go insane and take any revenge whatsoever. Oh and Meepits taste like sugar cubes! Yep, they do!

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