Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 149,520,230 Issue: 285 | 30th day of Running, Y9
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Is Your Petpet Planning World Domination?


by temari_san_no_hoshi

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With these ten points, just read my easy guide and you can know if your petpet is in league with Sloth and his evil clones. Or any other villain... ;)

10. One day when you come home from a hard day of work, you find Sloth’s Grundos and clones standing in front of your house and when you look through a window you see Sloth and Aphrodite, my beautiful Scarabug, going over many pieces of paper. And talking to each other... Funny that, my petpet never talks to me... ***Petpet Suspicion rate: 8/10***

9. While you are reading your younger siblings a bedtime story, you stop because you are disturbed by a small though high pitched guffaw and you realise your petpet is in the corner learning how to cackle and laugh like a villain. Picked it up from Sloth, maybe? ***Petpet Suspicion rate: 6/10***

8. When you try to talk to your petpet, you realise that it is saying very interesting things, such as: “Enough of this silly rubbish! Have you seen my invitation to Sloth’s World Domination Sleepover?” Or: “Gimme my mind control flakes.”...So now it talks to me! Finally! ***Petpet Suspicion rate: 9/10***

7. Becoming an extremely picky eater at lunch and dinner. While it's ignoring yesterday night’s leftovers, you find your beloved petpet is having a midnight feast on her own “mind control flakes” which look and smell suspiciously like chocolate flakes... Never talk with your mouth stuffed with “mind control flakes” is what the saying should be...***Petpet Suspicion rate: 8/10

6. While you’re having a spring cleaning day, you wander into your room. As you’re cleaning out your petpet’s bed, you look and find a talking Jhudora. Weird, I didn’t know that they made plushies that could talk like that. WARNING: If you do happen to ever find a talking and moving Jhudora plushie lying in a bed, don’t pick it up. Alert your owner at once because the Jhudora plushie seemed to have a lot of teeth. I wish my petpet talked as much as this plushie! ***Petpet Suspicion rate: 7/10***

5. As you’re shopping for a new red brush and a new bar of soap with your lovely owner, your petpet shuffles off in an ugly fashion and talks to a mutant Grundo, exchanging paperwork. Fine! Don’t talk to me! Talk to strangers! Whatever happened to “Stranger Danger”? ***Petpet Suspicion rate: 6/10***

4. Your petpet becomes particularly happy when you announce to it that you were taking it on holiday to the Haunted Woods and it brings rather large suitcase full of interesting looking Battledome weapons. I didn’t know petpets battled at Battledome... Didn’t know that they needed any equipment... *squeaky voice from outside the window* Head Shot! Body Blow! Hi-ya! Take that... Ooh! That sounded bad... ***Petpet Suspicion rate: 7/10***

3. The Defenders of Neopia visit one day and knock on your door, asking your owner whether if he/she has seen a mad petpet on the loose around here. They explain that it was last seen entering your neohome, just after robbing the bank with an army of meepits... Meepits? With my little cuddly wuddly snookums? How is that possible? She wouldn’t hurt a fly! She just learned how to talk... ***Petpet Suspicion rate: 10/10***

2. Almost there now... *yawn* Finding that your petpet is incredibly rich now, thanks to robbing a bank, but now and then you always seem to see red gleams in its eye and how it keeps talking to itself about Jelly World. Now you tell me! Where on Neopia is Jelly World? How come I’ve never been there? Maybe that’s where Mom keeps on getting those jellies...

Me: Mom! How come you’ve never taken me to Jelly World?

Mom: Because, sweetie, it doesn’t exist!

Me: Then why is Aphrodite talking about it?

Mom: Aphrodite talked? About time!

Me: MOM! I’ve been talking about it for the last ten minutes!

***Petpet Suspicion rate: 6/10*** *** My mom not listening to me suspicion rate: 11/10***

1. The Classic and Major Give-Away: *drum roll* shifty eyes, nice! If you still don’t believe petpets have the ability to take control of the world, check the history of petpets and the famous petpets underneath...

No-one knows the actual origin of petpets (Maybe except for TNT of course!). For all we know, they just popped into existence and they became a lovable pet for all neopets.

There have been many ummm... interesting petpets in the past that are unique to their species. Here are just a few examples:

Turmaculus. Yup! A giant petpet that sleeps in the middle of Meridell. If you’re lucky, your cute, sweet, and innocent (well, maybe not so innocent in this guide’s case) petpet might wake him up. There are 2 choices, which are NOT for YOU to choose. Your petpet might just get swallowed and eaten by Turmy or get a reward. :)

The Slug Monster! Another giant petpet except this one roams around the ruins of Maraqua and is awake most of the time. If you like a big picture of a big monster and the words “GO AWAY” underneath, I suggest you go to the ruins of Maraqua.

The Petpet Lab Ray Kookith. Another one? *whines* Getting tired here! Okay. The Kookith that zaps your petpet is probably the most dangerous out of all the “famous” petpets *cough cough ahem*. It has the ability to zap your pet into anything! Very tricky and cunning... and of course its eyes! Soooooooooo sleeeeeeeeeeppyyyy...

Temari_san_no_hoshi: Snap out of it! If you want this story to make it in the Neopian Times then you have to STAY ALERT!

Temper, temper! Is this the last one? Yes? Great! Finally I can get my smoothie and have a rest... Oh! That’s right! I’m meant to keep on going... Sorry, folks, I just drifted off...

The Snowager! Another famous petpet! Very much like Turmy, it enjoys sleeping but only for a few hours a day. It is not there for you to wake but to steal from! Neggs, books, plushies, keyrings, scratchcards and a lot more. So if it’s asleep, REMEMBER: that’s good news!

Thank you to my gallery for inspiring me and thank you to all my friends that pointed out my mistakes.

 
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