Sanity is forbidden Circulation: 123,711,044 Issue: 249 | 21st day of Swimming, Y8
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The Real Story of That Mysterious Symol

by multitasker3000


Also by ice_creema876

MERIDELL - We decided, after much chatting and pondering, that we, Lauren and Ice, being the brave and courageous Neopians that we are, would discover what lurks beneath this mysterious Symol Hole in Meridell. This is a written record of our oddly amusing journey into the Symol Hole.

-We enter the Symol Hole and look around ourselves at the magnificent photographs, memorabilia and other knickknacks. Surprisingly, the hole is tall enough for us to stand at our full 5 feet or so. Many rare items decorate the walls and shelves of the hole.-


Ice: Sweet Borovan! This place is loaded! What a greedy Symol, he’s got all this good stuff and he never gives any away!

Lauren: Ooh.. Check out all the shininess!

[end whispering, and the look around for the Symol, who is quietly sitting in an armchair, blending in rather well with the very clean (almost abnormally so) hole]

Together: Mr. Symol? Excuse us. Is that your name? Just Mr. Symol?

Mr. Symol looks at both of us and sighs, muttering: Dirty creatures. They’re getting the floor all nasty again.. I’m going to have to clean it up and it’s all their fault. Ugh!

Lauren: Er... oookay. Can you explain exactly how you got here?

Mr. Symol, trying to drive the two out: Well, kids, I got here by digging me a pleasant little hole.

Ice, slightly disappointed by Mr. Symol's bland behavior: Why is it that we never get anything useful from this place? All we ever get is "Wasn't that fun? Let's try again tomorrow!" and it gets annoying!

Mr. Symol: -sighs- Fine, fine, fine. All I ever really wanted was to sit down and talk down and talk to Good Ol’ Snowy. -sighs and smiles at one of the many photographs of the Snowager- But now I’ve got to clean up after all you dirty visitors.

Ice, slightly mortified by this obsession with Snowy and cleanliness: Do you control the avatar, the one for the Symol Hole, I mean? Because if you do, I know a lot of people that would love to meet you.

-a fan screams from the top of the hole, “OMG LYKE C4N i HAVe UR 4vVI????!!!1!!!”-

Ice, looking around: Um, I’d just like to clarify that that wasn’t my fault, okay?

Mr. Symol: Sweet Borovan! You got them going like stampeding Kaus and Gnorbus again! -throws up an avatar- Ahh! They've gotten dirt into my underground hole! -runs to find a broom, then quickly sweeps his dirt floor-

Ice: So, do you um, collect anything in particular? -stares at masses of Snowager collectables-

Before Mr. Symol can answer, Lauren says: Mr. Symol, what is this large contraption? -stands amazed before a large gold snake-like figure-

Mr. Symol: Why Lauren, that is my Snowager Fan Club 8 Year Appreciation of We-Love-Good-Old-Snowy-Boy Member Trophy. -Lauren goes to poke- NO! DON'T TOUCH IT! You might scratch the fine metallic alloy paint finish with your grubby dirt covered fingers!

-Lauren steps back but bumps into mass of Roo Island Sporks-

Mr. Symol, whimpering: You've- you've- you've knocked into my -begins to wail- SPORK ARMY!!!

Lauren, dumbfounded that there is someone else who owns a spork army: You have a spork army? I've found someone of my kind!

-goes and hugs the old Symol and starts talking about sporks and their magnificent beauty-

Lauren: -whispering to Mr. Symol- Aren't sporks great?

Mr. Symol: Yes, indeed! Over a period of 8 years, I have collected over 439,721 sporks!

Lauren: Whoa, you must a be a spork master! Tell me more!

-conversation carries on-

-Ice twiddles her thumbs for about 20 minutes, but gives up on any conversation change-

Ice: Excuse me! Can we talk about normal things? Like what we came for, Lauren? Such as Mr. Symol's life down here?

Mr. Symol, looking up from spork conversation, says: Oh, my life isn't that interesting, but I suppose I can tell you if you really want. Sit, sit.

-Lauren and Ice both sit on a pair of red beanbags on command-

Ice: When did you dig your pleasant -stares at walls covered with spork and Snowager items- little hole down here? Did you come down here with the intention of being a star?

Mr. Symol: Yes, Yes, pleasant is my little home. No, I didn't want to be famous. It all started one day when I heard a mass of pets and petpets gathering around my little hole. Some petpets cannonballed into my little home and disrupted my midnoon tea time. They looked around and asked for an item or avatar or something of use. When I told them that I was busy they hmphed at me and went back up to Meridell and told their pets, "Wasn't that fun? Let's do it again tomorrow!" just so they could keep bothering me. And that’s where the idea of visiting the Symol Hole began.

Lauren: Wow, what prompted you to dig this hole in the middle of Meridell?

Mr. Symol: Well -sighs- after a long life, living in Neopia beside a Red Gelert, named -sighs again- oh, I can't remember, I crawled out of a safety deposit box somewhere in Faerieland. In the beginning, I was bought from the Petpet shop in Meridell. Then my not-so loving owner attached me to a red female Gelert. I lived happily with them for a while, but then my Gelert was pounded. I lived for a long time in the pound, almost a year. Then I was adopted! I was so happy, but then, I was taken and tossed into the new owner's safety deposit box. The new owner didn't like me. She wanted to paint my Gelert Faerie and give her a Floud. I was too ugly, too earthy. After about a week I decided that this girl was never going to sell me or put me with a new pet, so I dug my way out and hitchhiked my way here.

-Mr. Symbol starts to cry, and Ice begins to wail along with him, the two sobbing into each others arms-

Lauren, handing Mr. Symol a hankie, says: Aw man... That’s a shame. So you came here? Just to get away from it all?

Mr. Symol, after examining the hankie closely to make sure it’s clean: Yes, that’s right. I didn’t want to be abandoned anymore, to feel all that pain again!

Ice: I’m sorry –pats Mr. Symol on the back-

Mr. Symol: Don’t touch me with your dirty fingers!

Ice: Er... sorry? -looks around for a change of subject- So when did you start collecting -gestures around the room- all this?

Mr. Symol: Once I came here and settled down, putting in furniture and such, I got a bit bored. I mean, it was pleasant, but there seemed to be something missing. So when I started hearing about this great big Snowager creature, I thought, ‘There’s something interesting!’ and began to look for Snowager things. I found quite a few, as you can see, and my collection began to expand. I met up with some folks, and we started the Snowy Fan Club. Ah, those were good times.

Lauren, staring with a glazed look at the sporks: And what about all these sporks?

Mr. Symol, noting Lauren’s stare and becoming a bit worried, backs away: Well, ah, that’s a secret.

Lauren: Please? -gives puppydog pout-

Mr. Symol: Well, Okay I guess. -whispers in Lauren's ear-

Lauren, big eyed and flabbergasted: Whoa!

Ice: And what about your Snowy Fan Club now?

Mr. Symol: Well, -sighs- The president decided to well, stop, having our weekly meetings. He said that it was best for all of us, since there were only four of us in the club anyways.

Lauren: That's so sad! Can we hunt down the president and tell him to re-establish the club?

-Lauren begins to climb out of the hole but Ice pulls her back in-

Mr. Symol: Have you ever visited the Brain Tree?

Ice: Of course! I LOVE hunting for answers then getting big prizes! BWAHAHA!

Mr. Symol: Well, you know how that haunted beast wants to know where and when Lenny Meerca died a long time ago?

Lauren: I think I know where this is going....

Ice: You think Lauren? Whoa....but yes, he died -thinks-

Mr. Symbol: Oh, it doesn't matter darling, but Lenny Meerca was the club president.

Lauren: Was Lenny Meerca a Lenny or a Meerca?

Ice: Lauren! Sheesh, can't you ever be quiet?

Mr. Symol: That's quite alright. He was a Kougra. Oh for Borovan's sake, it's almost time!

Lauren: Why is that....

Ice: Isn't this when Snowy falls asleep again?

Mr. Symol: Yes yes, people flock to me at about this time. It would be wise for you to leave to avoid horrible chaos.

Ice: That doesn't make any sense.. why would they mob you then?

Mr. Symol, frowning: Well, word of my Snowager fandom seems to have gotten above ground. I suppose they think they can get the Snowager avatar from me or something. Or maybe they think that since I'm a Snowager fan, I like to do things at the same time he goes to sleep and give out my own avatar or something weird like that. I have no idea where they get these insane ideas from.

Ice, staring: Yeahhh... Neither do I.

-awkward silence-

Lauren: Well, it's been a pleasure interviewing you, Mr Symol! Time to go now though... They're giving out free sporks at Roo Island!

Mr. Symol: Very well then, I wish your spork collecting journey the very best.

Ice: Thank you so much, sir! -aside to Lauren: Free sporks, eh? Nice way to get out of there.

Lauren, staring at Ice, confused: What are you talking about? They really ARE giving out free sporks and we definitely have to go! Come on!

-Ice groans as she, then Lauren, climb out of the old symol's hole.-

Ice: So that's the end of our journey (barring the side trip to Roo Island, which consisted of Lauren dragging me around to stare at sporks). We brave Neopians wandered deep into Meridell to interview a spectacular being, none other than... Mr. Symol!

Lauren, popping her head in: That's all, folks!

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