There are ants in my Lucky Green Boots Circulation: 122,607,461 Issue: 247 | 7th day of Swimming, Y8
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An Interview with Hannah & Gwyl


by weaponstar

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Me: Hi there! My name is Weaponstar, and I’m here to talk to two of Neopia’s well-known characters – and ask them a few questions o’ course. This here is Hannah (the Brave) –

Hannah: Hello.

Me: – the Usul. I’m sure you all know her. And this is Gwyl –

Gwyl: Hi.

Me: – who is a smaller-than-average Symol in the game Gwyl’s Great Escape. Just to remind you, he decided to venture down low where the best booty could be unearthed, but got stuck due to some unfortunately timed landslides. His friend, a petpetpet called… what was it?

Hannah: Something like a “Leetnat,” I think.

Gwyl: Lightmite.

Me: Thank you. Yeah… a Lightmite. Oh, and Gwyl?

Gwyl: Yep?

Me: Who had the idea? You or the Lightmite?

Gwyl: *quickly* It says, in the intro, “Luckily for him, he has a cunning plan.”

Hannah: Learnt it off by heart, did you?

Me: Okay, just checking. So Gwyl had this idea. Suffice to say it involved a balloon and a makeshift wind-machine, and if you want the details you can go and look at the game’s intro.

Hannah: Can I say something?

Me: *sits back* It’s what you’re here for.

Hannah: Okay, you know that caption a little while back featuring myself and him?

Gwyl: Yes.

Me: Sure do.

Hannah: Good. I’m sure you know that was like, a true happening and not just a made up picture?

Gwyl: *nods*

Me: Er…

Hannah: It was kind of funny, in retrospect. All these people trying to think up witty comments to enter in the contest, and there we were, observing it all.

Me: Were any of the winning captions marginally correct?

Hannah: Kiiiind of… Look, none of the caption winners got it quite right, but to be honest, they were trying to be funny, and all credit to them for being so. They just didn’t manage to pin down what happened with supreme correctness. What happened was: I was walking along, minding my own business, when I felt this breeze on my head. Instinctively I ducked, thinking that one of them ghostlike things that apparently are fireballs had crept up on me. But no, what floated past overhead resembled, at first, a blue and red creature was a single glaring eye. Naturally I screamed. Next second I realised it was in fact Gwyl here - *prods on head* - with a balloon tied around his middle, a strange light-creating mechanism tied to his head, and one of what would soon have been MY gems in his paws!

Me: Hold there please. *turns to Gwyl* Is this all correct as you know it?

Gwyl: Basically, yeah. *whispers* and I was surprised her screaming hadn’t deafened me, it was so loud.

Hannah: *composed* It’s a talent for scaring Fireballs. So next I demanded to know what he was doing in my game area and why he was hanging from a balloon. I hardly ever saw Symols down there, I guess most were too scared. He said –

Gwyl: I said, I don’t know about any game area, but the reason for this, along with my companion the Lightmite, is my ticket out o’ here! So then she asked what and where was this Mightlite thingymergiger.

Hannah: Just “thing.”

Gwyl: Thing is, I was unaware that poor Lighty had got lost farther back somehow, and was no longer guiding my balloon with puffs of wind from its wings. And THEN –

Hannah: And then, right on cue after realising the danger he was in, he went smack-bam into a very cold and hard cavern wall.

Gwyl: Yes. My poor nose still suffers.

Hannah: Never have a long nose in the tunnels. Good advice, that.

Gwyl: *blithely* I wondered why yours was so flat against ya face.

Hannah: *mouthing like a fish*

Me: Okay, movin’ on!

Hannah: But…!

Me: Moving on please!!!

Gwyl: To where?

Me: Anywhere but here. Hey I know… who got the gem in the end?

Gwyl: *grimaces* The Pawkeet.

Hannah: *recovered* It had been following him around for hours, awaiting its chance. I did wonder why the tunnels were so quiet. When Gwyl hit the wall, he of course managed to drop the gem.

Gwyl: And she wasn’t fast enough to rescue it before that pesky squawking creature got it.

Hannah: It pecked me on the head! I lost a life, for goodness sake!

Gwyl: I wondered why you disappeared so sudden.

Hannah: I had to go and start over.

Me: So how are things in the tunnels now?

Hannah: *considers* …Busy…

Me: You’re not still fighting for game area, are you?

Gwyl: ‘Fraid so.

Hannah: It was all my ground in the beginning! It’s not fair that now lots of other games are played out there. I shall complain to the Staff Members!

Gwyl: And what can they do about it? We’re here now.

Hannah: They could send you to the Game Graveyard! …Kidding. They could relocate your game to another set of tunnels somewhere else.

Gwyl: Where else is there? You and your TWO games are already taking up all the tunnels that I’m aware of.

Hannah: I bet the Staff Members can make it so we discover some more.

Gwyl: Where?

Hannah: On the other side of Neopia, of course!

Me: That would be cool.

Hannah: Sure would. New tunnels to explore, new caves to plunder, new pools to dive to the bottom of…

Gwyl: *whispers* I thought she meant that I would be relocated to these new caves?

Me: *whispers back* Obviously we… you were mistaken.

Hannah: *natters on*

Me: So, Gwyl, what do you think of sailing around giant caverns tied to a balloon?

Gwyl: It’s all right really. My friend, the Lightmite, is a bit unpredictable sometimes, though – half the time it is flitting around and blowing away, being really careful, but the other half it’s making my balloon go this way and that, up and down… and I often get really close to the spikes on those times.

Me: *nods* Right *understands what Gwyl is on about even though the Symol himself does not* Have you yet made it back to the top?

Gwyl: That’s a funny thing, y’know. ‘cause I do remember reaching the end, and getting back out an’ all. …But the next second I find myself back down in the mine again. Strange, eh?

Me: Yes.

Hannah: …So I guess you can tell I’ve been hoping like anything that they will be some amazing new tunnels on the other side of Neopia.

Me: Eh?

Gwyl: What you on about?

 
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