Enter the Snowflake's lair... Circulation: 118,827,471 Issue: 239 | 12th day of Hunting, Y8
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A Trip to the Doctor

by mystery_island111223


"Yep. It's Fuzzy Fungus!"

      The doctor looked at me. "It's possibly the most dangerous disease out there. By the end of the week your poor Bori will become a fungus ball!"

      "It sounds funny!" I laughed. "Fuzzy fungus, that's a really funny name!"

      "It's not funny! It's a horrible disease! Fuzzy fungus is a dangerous illness! Stop laughing!!!"

      The doctor glared at me. My Christmas Bori named Apoc stood up.

      "So you're saying I'll become a fungus ball? Cool!"

      "It's not cool! It's very dangerous!" The doctor glared at Apoc now.

      "How so?"

      "Well, fungus balls don't have eyes right? You could bump into somebody!" The doctor stuck his tongue out at Apoc and turned to me. "The cure is a serving of Honey Blossom Extract. It costs about 8000 NP!"

      I stopped laughing.

      "I don't want to pay that! Why should I, when both of us will be happy with Apoc's new look!"

      "Do what I say! I am a certified doctor! Do what I say!!" The doctor was now breathing heavily.

      "Hey, MI." Apoc turned to me. "I bet that nice Cybunny in the Lost Desert has a cheaper cure!"

      "GET OUT OF MY SHOP!!!" The Gelert now looked ready to call security.

      I was going to point out that the Neopian Hospital wasn't actually a shop because you couldn't buy anything there, but thought better of it.

      So the week passed. Apoc and I agreed to get along with his new disease. I could warn him if he was about to bump into somebody. The two of us made plans to adjust the stairs in our neohome so he could get up them easily in his new form. Everything was ready.

      Except the disease didn't come.

      One week came and went. Apoc did not feel very purple, or spherical. We waited a few more weeks. After all, the disease description did say he would become a fungus ball slowly.

      A month passed. We decided to pay the doctor a visit.

      "Hello," I said as I came into the Neopian Hospital.

      "Let me guess, your pet has bloaty feet. Horrible disease bloaty feet, gets really bad if you don't buy the cure. Looks pretty bad already!" The doctor gestured to Apoc.

      "I don't have bloaty feet!" screamed Apoc.

      "Oops, my mistake!" The doctor laughed a little. "Anyway, how can I help you?"

      "My Bori was supposed to turn into a fungus ball weeks ago!" I pointed at Apoc. "Can you tell me what's wrong?"

      "Nothing's wrong!" The doctor suddenly became very nervous. "Sometimes pets just heal by themselves! Nothing to worry about!"

      Suddenly the door burst open. I turned my head and was very surprised to see the Elephante from the pharmacy. She grabbed the doctor and dragged him into a supply closet.

      "What did I just hear?" she asked. "This pet didn't get sick! Don't tell me you didn't give him the injection! You know how it works, dear brother! You create the diseases, I post random events saying pets get these diseases. Then they visit you. You make an excuse and give the pet an injection with the actual disease. Then get them to buy the cure from me! What do you have to say for yourself!?"

      "I have something to say!" said Apoc. "The door for your supply closet isn't soundproof!"

      The Elephante emerged. She glared at us.

      Apoc screamed.

      I came to tied up in a dark room. Apoc was tied up next to me.

      "Apoc!" I whispered. "Are you awake?"

      "You bet!" cried Apoc. "C'mon, MI, let's get out of here. I'll distract her!"

      Apoc took a deep breath.

      "Hey chubby! Yeah you, dung breath! Fight me like a real Neopet! Come on!"

      The Elephante turned. She snarled.

      "Wait!" said a voice.

      The doctor appeared. He was shaking, but stepped in front of his sister.

      "Yay!" I cried. "The doctor has turned to the side of good! He'll help us escape and defeat the evil pharmacist!"

      "No," the doctor began. "I was just thinking we could question them before we beat them senseless with Rods Of Supernova!"

      There was a long pause.

      "Hooray!" I cried.

      Soon Apoc and I found ourselves locked in a cell. Apoc had just been taken out to be questioned. I busied myself playing the great game all prisoners play, Cellblock! Unfortunately my only opponent was a small Spyder.

      Finally Apoc came back to the cell.

      "Apoc!" I cried. "Can you help me out with this Cellblock game? The Spyder's beating me!"

      "Forget the game!" The Elephante grabbed me. "You're getting questioned next!"

      I was taken into a room. The Elephante sat me down in a wooden chair and began pacing up and down.

      "So MI," she began. "What did you hear?"

      "Well, I heard everything! I heard all about your plan! I even heard that you two are siblings! Can I go now?"

      "That's interesting!" She stopped pacing. "Your Bori said something different!"

      "He gave a different story?" I asked meekly.

      "No he offered to let you stay here and he wouldn't tell a soul as long as he could go free!" The Elephante stepped closer.

      I was about to respond when a large crash sent me flying. As I looked at the figure standing in the ruins of what used to be a wall I couldn't believe my eyes.

      It was the Cybunny who ran the emergency supply shop in the Lost Desert.

      She quickly defeated the Elephante and tied her up. Then she approached me.

      "Are you alright?" She helped me to my feet. "Good thing the Defenders and I got here in time!"

      "Defenders?" I asked.

      "That's right!" She took off the brown robes to reveal a cape and superhero outfit. "I'm an undercover operative with the Defenders of Neopia! I was trying to help strengthen pets and cure them of their illness for the fight against evil! For a long time we've thought the diseases were something more sinister! I've had my eye on these two for a long time!"

      "I'm confused!" I said. "If you're a Defender of Neopia, what's your superpower?"

      "I can make an old blanket cure neomonia!"

      "Cool!" I cried.

      As we were headed outside I noticed Judge Hog and Danger Buzz had tied up the doctor too. That reminded me of someone.

      "Wait!" I cried. "I forgot my Bori!"

      The Cybunny and I raced through several rooms back to the cell. We found it empty. Apparently Apoc had dug his way out.

      We crawled through the tunnel and emerged in a lab.

      "Hey MI!" Apoc waved at me and gestured to some strange potions. "I think these are how they made the diseases!" As Apoc waved he knocked over a potion. This caused another one to fall, and another. This continued until every single potion had been smashed on the floor.

      "I don't feel good!" I moaned.

      The three of us headed outside. I was shocked to realize that we were in the basement of the Neopian Hospital the whole time. Judge Hog came up to us. The Cybunny coughed and explained what had happened.

      "Well," Judge Hog sneezed. "I think it's obvious what happened. The Bori here released the diseases to the general public. They're real threats now!" He turned to the Cybunny. "We need your medicine now more then ever!"

      "I don't have enough supplies!" the Cybunny cried. "Neopia is doomed!"


      We all turned to see the pharmacist and doctor, both tied up. The pharmacist smiled.

      "If you let us go free we can provide all of you with a cure!" She grinned. "Do you really have a choice?"

      "Never!" Judge Hog cried.

      "We'll also throw in some extra medicine! Given the new disease outbreak I think the price for even the smallest slice of Neopox Pizza will be in the tens of thousands!" The pharmacist glanced at us.

      "Besides!" the doctor added. "What reason would we have for continuing to create diseases? There's enough to go around for a long time, thanks to you!"

      Apoc laughed nervously and hid behind me.

      "Here's something you should remember!" Judge Hog struck a heroic pose. "No Defender of Neopia can be bribed with a few neopoints!"

      "I on the other hand can!" I took this moment to untie the two pets. I was presented with a large pile of medicine.

      The two pets ran off. Apoc and I decided to leave too, given how Judge Hog was pointing a Ultra Bubble Gun at us.

      Later I sold my items for 200,000 NP. I was quite pleased.

      The Elephante pharmacist made tons of money off the outbreak of diseases. I last saw her wielding a Golden Butter Knife, which I really don't think should be in the hands of someone like her.

      The Cybunny also made a fairly decent profit.

      Finally, Apoc came down with Neomonia after I fed him some Poisonous Jelly. It cost me all the money I made off selling the medicine to cure him.

      So did I learn a lesson from all that? Of course!

      Don't feed your pet Poisonous Jelly.

The End

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