Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 117,233,045 Issue: 233 | 31st day of Running, Y8
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Faerieland: a Disaster Waiting to Happen

by upcat13


Author's note: this article will be written like an essay: if it bores you, you have been warned.

Maraqua - you’ve all heard of the Maraquan whirlpool, that dreadful disaster which destroyed an entire world. Fortunately, the city has been rebuilt and has made an impressive reentrance to the world. But the question that has been nagging on my mind for some time is: Will it happen again? Not to Maraqua but to some other world. In the interests of stopping disaster in its tracks, I traveled all over Neopia and at last found the world most susceptible to destruction. The place where disaster might strike at any time: Faerieland!


Honestly, it’s floating on clouds for faeries' sakes! Held up by the queen's magic, it floats there peacefully, a major attraction for pets to live. But what if some villain found his or her way into the castle, somehow managed to undo the spell, and sent Faerieland falling to its doom in the sea, a thousand feet below?!

What can we do to prevent it?

Strengthen the spells holding up Faerieland for one thing. And perhaps put out routine drills, so that pets that can fly can carry others who can’t fly to safety.

What would happen?

Let us imagine for a moment what it would be like to be in Faerieland if such a disaster happened. Let's say you and your pets are walking down a cobbled stone street in Faerieland. On ether side of the street are shops selling faerie souvenirs. The sky is clear and sunny. Suddenly you feel a slight tremor; other shoppers look up, puzzled. There are a few minutes of peace before you continue walking. Then suddenly the ground shakes and you fall down. Then, just beside you, a cobblestone falls out and plummets through the clouds. You look around in horror as a spider web of cracks spreads out and more stones fall down out of the street. Soon whole shops are collapsing in on themselves, falling through the sky to splash into the sea far below! You grab your pets and run! Everywhere there is shouting and screaming. Winged pets take to the sky and faeries run about weaving useless charms. Suddenly the street beneath you gives way! You’re falling, falling, your pets clinging to you for protection! You look up. Faerieland is diminishing quickly as you fall farther and farther away from it. But you can see the cracks moving about its clouded underside, the debris falling through the gaping holes. You hear the countless screams of other owners and pets. You look down. Rushing up to meet you is a wide dark sea. Ripples from the splashes of others and debris lick the surface. You hold your pets tightly as you hit the water. There is a loud splash and freezing sensation, and all is darkness… (You can stop imagining now.)

Who would do such a thing?

Any one of the major villains (Sloth, Hubrid Nox, Jhudora) could do it but I have a theory.

It concerns the whirlpool that destroyed Maraqua. It said that the whirlpool was created by a pirate's curse, or more specifically Captain Scarblade's curse. Now why, during the curse of Maraqua plot, didn’t he just summon the whirlpool again? Why didn’t he just sit back and watch the city be destroyed again rather than rushing underwater with his crew and being defeated by king Kelpbeard and the pirates? The answer is simple my friends: Scarblade did not cause the whirlpool! He had raided and pillaged Maraqua certainly, and he took full credit for the whirlpool, braggart that he is, but he did not if fact cause it.

It is my opinion that something far more sinister than Scarblade destroyed old Maraqua, something that for a thousand years has waited quietly in the shadows of Neopia, causing disasters here and there. Disasters in the Lost Desert, Meridell, Terror Mountain, Mystery Island, the Haunted Woods, everywhere, with mysterious causes behind them. It is my belief that a secret evil, unlike anything we’ve seen before, is spreading its shadows around Neopia, patiently working to its own unknown ends.

It’s obvious that Princess Sankara didn’t poison Coltzan by herself. She must have had help. What kind of pet would finance a place like the Deserted Fairground? Who did the evil Razul learn from to work his dark sorcery? What sort of power would be required to make a whirlpool destructive enough to destroy an entire world? Who is this villain?

Our one clue as to what evil this is comes form Terror Mountain. In Happy Valley there is a place called the ice cream cart. A strange otter-like creature named Mr. Chipper, who greets you with a smile and a wave, runs it. It looks like a perfectly innocent getup; Mr. Chipper asks you for coupons. If you have coupons, he gives you ice cream, but if you don’t have coupons (and this is the suspicions part) he will say:

“If you don't have a coupon, I'd run away as quickly as possible. Seriously.”

Disturbing, aye? What’s so important about these coupons that would make this so-called Mr. Chipper so angry that he might do grievous bodily harm to you? Perhaps he’s a secret agent for some unknown villain, intent on ruling all of Neopia! What exactly is he any way? I’ve never seen a pet like him before.

In any case, this is a deep and dark mystery, one that needs the keenest minds in Neopia working on it. Maybe we can at last unravel the riddle of this evil, is it wicked through and through or is there more to its actions than meets the eye? Only time will tell.

In conclusion

Well, there you have it, my dear readers. You know that Faerieland is the place most likely for the next disaster. You know how to prevent such a thing from happening (sort of). You know what it would be like to be in Faerieland in such a disaster. And you have been given a glimpse at the horrors that might cause such a disaster. I hope this opens your eyes a bit, my dear readers, to help stop disaster. Until we meet again, goodbye and good luck.

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