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Kreludor Interviews

by mooniebunnypenny


Kreludor! Neopia’s moon. So round. So inhabited-by-orange-Grundos. So moon…ish. Umm... there's a lot to say about it!

Well anyway, Kreludor is home to many Orange Grundos. No one is really sure how they got there, but some people have ideas...

Well anyway, today we will be going on a tour of Kreludor! We'll see every store and other thing on the Moon! You can even see interviews with the shopkeepers! Let's go to the moon... um... how do we get there anyway?

Well anyway, let's go into the first store! It's... the Kreludan Mining Corp! It's... a mine?

Interview With the S750 Kreludan Defender Robot:

Moonie: So... what exactly is this place?

Defender Robot: It's a mine... and I am not programmed to tell you any more.

Moonie: So... what exactly is your laser for?

Defender Robot: It's for ZAPPING PEOPLE!!!! I love to zap people! It's FUN!!!!!... I mean, it's for protecting the mine from intruders.

Moonie: Okay... so, what exactly is the authorization code? I never could figure it out...

Defender Robot: Hey, are you trying to get in here so you can tell the people reading your Neopian Times article what it is and what's in there?

Moonie: Um... no.

Defender Robot: I think that someone's coming. You'd better leave...

Moonie: Oh no! *runs away but almost forgets her notebook. Just as she leaves, the spot where she was just standing seconds ago is zapped by something that no one is quite sure what it is yet...*

Defender Robot: Darn it, I almost got her! I've zapped everyone else... why couldn't I get her? It would be FUN!!!!1111!!!!!

I don't know very much about this place, because I am not sure what the code is... but anyway, let's move on!

Okay... so we're here at the Neocola Machine. There's no one to interview, so... let's just see what we can do!

Neocola Machine: What are you talking about? Interview me!

Moonie: Um... did the machine just talk?

Neocola Machine: Yeah!

Moonie: Okay... so... why exactly are you here?

Neocola Machine: I'm not sure. I've been here as long as I can remember...

Moonie: Can you really talk, or am I just insane?

Neocola Machine: Well...

Moonie: So anyways, what happens if you press the RED BUTTON?!?!?

Neocola Machine: I'll zap you and turn you into sludge.

Moonie: So... what happens if you put in a token for a soda?

Neocola Machine: Well, if you know how to use me, you get a soda. But if you don't... we're back to the sludge answer.

Moonie: Why do you zap people into sludge?

Neocola Machine: BECAUSE IT'S FU- I mean... because the red button activates the ray, and so does using me wrong!

Moonie: Um... I'm kinda thirsty. How could I get a soda from you?

Neocola Machine: Just press the RED BUTTON!!!!

Moonie: Um, okay... *presses the button*

*Suddenly, a bright light comes out of the machine. Moonie runs away, just as the ray is fired at the spot where she was just standing.*

Um... is it just me, or is it the second time during this article that I narrowly escaped death? Well, I guess we should move on...

So we're here at the Booktastic Books shop...

Interview with Bernard the Grundo

Moonie: So, what do you sell here?

Bernard: Booktastic Books. Didn't you read the sign?

Moonie: Yeah, but I don't think the people reading this article could read the sign...

Bernard: What article?

Moonie: I'm sending this to the Neopian Times!

Bernard: So... you mean that if your article is published, people all over Neopia are going to be reading about this?

Moonie: Yeah...

Bernard: But every time I'm featured in something that gets published, I almost get zapped by a ray!

Moonie: Why?

Bernard: I don't know...

Moonie: So, what are some of the books you sell?

Bernard: There's one called 'How Not To Get Zapped By Rays After You Are Featured In A Neopian Times Article... '

Moonie: Really?

Bernard: No...

Moonie: How long have you been selling books here?

Bernard: Since I opened the store...

Moonie: Okay... when did you open the store?

Bernard: When I opened it...

Moonie: How do you join the Booktastic Book club?

Bernard: By reading a lot of Booktastic Books!

Moonie: How many?

Bernard: About 55...

Moonie: I'll remember to cross 'Booktastic Book Club Trophy' off the list of trophies my pets should try to win...

Bernard: You have a list?

Moonie: ... No.

Bernard: Oh no, they're coming?

Moonie: Who's coming? *moves just as a ray zaps where she had been standing*

Um... why does that always happen? Anyway, time to move on!

Interview With the Shopkeeper of Cafe Kreludor:

Moonie: So... what's your name?

Shopkeeper: I don't have one.

Moonie: Okay... So what do you sell here?

Shopkeeper: Kreludor food...

Moonie: So, what food is Kreludor food?

Shopkeeper: ... ... ... ...

Moonie: So anyway, are there any zapping rays invoved?

Shopkeeper: No, but it's too bad! Zapping rays are FUN!!!!!

Moonie: Why does everyone say that?

Shopkeeper: I don't know!

Moonie: What do you think of your restaurant?

Shopkeeper: It's way better than Grundos Cafe! Do you agree, because I noticed your name is Mooniebunnypenny and not Space Stationiebunnypenny...

Moonie: I don't usually go to either place, but I just came here for the interview.

Shopkeeper: What interview?

Moonie: You don't know what I'm talking about?

Zapping Ray: I'm FUN!!!!

Moonie: I think I'll have to leave now. This is getting too confusing.

Zapping Ray: BYE!!!!! *zaps Mooniebunnypenny*

This has been a really weird interview! Anyway, let's move on! Let's see what's at Kreludan Homes.

Interview With the Shopkeeper of Kreludan Homes:

Moonie: Do you have a name?

Shopkeeper: No.

Moonie: What do you sell?

Shopkeeper: I sell furniture... I think.

Moonie: What do you mean?

Shopkeeper: I haven't exactly seen what they sell... every time they restock, I'm not looking.

Moonie: Really?

Shopkeeper: ... No.

Moonie: Do you have a zapping ray?

Shopkeeper: I sometimes sell them...

Moonie: Really?

Shopkeeper: No.

Moonie: How often do people buy from you?

Shopkeeper: No.

Moonie: What do you like about working here?

Shopkeeper: No.

Moonie: How many people do you think have bought from you today?

Shopkeeper: No.

Moonie: Is 'no' the only thing you're going to say?

Shopkeeper: Yes.

Moonie: So, are there any zapping rays AT ALL here?

Shopkeeper: No, there are NO zapping rays.

Moonie: What happens if I press this button?

*Moonie presses the button, and suddenly a bunch of (well, you know)s come out of the wall*

Moonie: You said there were no zapping rays!

Shopkeeper: Hey, I said I'd only say 'no!'

Moonie: Um... I think I should leave now. I have to get back to Neopia Central and submit this to the Neopian Times.

Shopkeeper: You can leave. I need to... um... do something.

Moonie: Okay...

But I noticed that as soon as I left, music started playing and all the zapping rays became disco balls! (So that WAS true...)

Well anyway, we're at our last stop... the Colouring Pages! There's no one here to interview, but at least you can get a picture to color! Have fun coloring and don't forget to come back to the NT for more of my crazy interviews! (If you REALLY think you can stand it...)

Well, I have to submit this to the Neopian Times now! Remember: The Neocola Machine CAN talk. IT CAN, I TELL YOU!!!!!

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