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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 2nd day of Swimming, Yr 22
The Neopian Times Week 7 > Neomarket Report

The Neo-Market Report

And now, the time has come to drop in on Neopia’s leading financial forecasters. Joining Neil and Maria today will be Exselciore the Scorchio, founder and President of EEEEEURGH!!! Ltd. Exselciore will discuss the market for inventions, as well as what the future holds for EEEEEURGH!!! Ltd. And now, here are our hosts…

KAUVUTO: Hello and welcome to this week’s edition of “The Neo-Market Report.” I’d like to start the show with a special thanks to Admiral Clawhammer and Ned the Buccaneer, who did a marvelous job filling in while we were on vacation last week. Once again, I am joined my co-host, the lovely and talented Maria Blumaroono, who’s at The News Desk with the latest news from the floor of the exchange. Maria, what’s the latest word?

BLUMAROONO: Arrgh Neil, it be rough sailin’ fer the Neodaq, as a number of top stocks be takin’ the plunge! *He he* But seriously, unless they turn things around, there might be a few CEOs who end up walking the plank. First among them is Aldrick Ptillery, whose Nakron plunged 37 NPs a share once rumours that they were developing some ultra-powerful Battle Magic items proved to be false. When asked about the rumours, Ptillery was quoted as saying, “It’s so unfair! It’s not as if we started those stories, and yet we’re the ones who are punished when they turn out to be untrue.”

KAUVUTO: Now that it looks like the once-imminent war between Neopia and their new pirate neighbours isn’t going to happen, a number of companies that benefited from the buccaneers’ arrival have started to take losses. Leading the way is Health Frog Groceries, whose stock value has dropped 27 NPs in the past week. Unfortunately, it looks like many Neopians have given up Health Food and chosen to return to their previous eating habits. “It’s a shame,” Quinton the Quiggle was heard saying, “I guess they just don’t know any better.” Another company hurt by the stabilising of the situation between the pirates and Neopians is Hakaheke Island Flights, who made great sums of NP when Mystery Islanders fled, thinking they’d be next on the pirates’ hit list after Maraqua. However, with Mystery Islanders no longer fearing an invasion, Hakaheke’s prices have plummeted.

BLUMAROONO: Well, one company that managed to turn a profit this week is that of our guest today. As the President of EEEEEURGH!!! Ltd., Exselciore the Scorchio has been at the forefront of developing new products for years. Today, he’s dropped in to inform us about what the future holds for his company. Exselciore, glad to have you stop by…

EXSELCIORE: Thank you, Maria. It brings me great happiness to be here.

BLUMAROONO: Now, you’ve seen what’s happened with Nakron this week. A bunch of unfounded rumours began to circulate, and even though they’re not responsible, it affected their stock value. What’s your opinion of this situation?

EXSELCIORE: That is why, for me at least, secrecy is of the utmost importance when it comes to my work. If your lab has a reputation for leaking information, then you’re vulnerable to these kinds of stories hurting you. In my circumstance, no one would ever believe such a rumour about EEEEEURGH!, because we would never allow for such information to circulate. Everyone would know right away that the story was false.

KAUVUTO: Despite your numerous brilliant creations, for the most part your company has been unable generate much in the way of profits. Have you considered making more… conventional products, you know, in order to be more financially successful?

EXSELCIORE: Ah, I would never consider such a move. Often times, the creative process is years ahead of mainstream tastes, which is why I can’t allow my imagination to be stifled by how people spend their NP. So, while in the short term, market conditions tend to make my life more difficult, in the long run, when my greatness is recognized, it will all have been worth it.

BLUMAROONO: Well, that’s all the time we have today. For Exselciore the Scorchio and Neil Kauvuto, this is Maria Blumaroono saying thank you and so long….

Check out previous Neomarket Reports:
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