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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 5th day of Running, Yr 23
The Neopian Times Week 77 > Continuing Series > Dungism: Part Five

Dungism: Part Five

by leb388

Untitled Document

In the greatest battles, it's always those who you least expect to be of any help whatsoever who are the real heroes. For when Shankly was nearly on top of them, it was Jamez who turned the tide...er, dung.

      Jamez was playing hackey-sack with Six, his Blue Shoyru (Yes, during the war.), and accidentally kicked the hackey-sack to Shankly's Secret Weapon. The padlock on it broke, and its wooden doors swung open. A huge wave of dung swept toward the entrance of the Hidden Tower, blocking Mr. Shankly from it when he was almost inside.

      "Leb388!" Megz suddenly gasped. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

      Leb388 nodded, and Megz tossed her a can of cleaning fluid. Quickly, they set to work spraying the dung, and they flung it toward Shankly and his army.

      Remarkably, cleaning fluid mixed with dung has a strange effect. It makes those with a spell put on them revert back to their original form. For Shankly's army, it erased the mind-controlling spell Shankly had put on them to make them believe in Dungism, and they became regular Neopians again. Those who had been hit with the dung became normal and started to fling dung at the remaining contaminated members of the army to free them.

      "All faeries, use your magic on the dung!" Fyora commanded. "Leave no Neopian unhit!"

      All the faeries put the curse-eraser spell on the dung and, even though it hurt their self-esteem, started flinging it at the opposing army.

      Jhudora finally stepped up to help Shankly. She threw exploding Shrunken Skull Marbles at the Anti-Dungists, and wore a Rainbow Swirly Thing around her neck like a necklace that protected her from being hit by the dung.

      "Leb388, can you take out that Rainbow Swirly Thing Jhudora has with a radish or something?" Megz asked.

      "No problem," she replied, aiming a radish with her bow. It hit Jhudora's Rainbow Swirly thing with perfect accuracy and shattered it.

      Suddenly, everyone started throwing dung at Jhudora. Mortified, she ran from the battle screaming, "My hair! My beautiful green and purple hair!"

      Finally, when the last member of Shankly's army was turned back into normal or had run, Shankly was defeated. He stood up and declared, "You may have beaten me once, but--"

      "I shall save you, Mr. Shankly!" al_the_chia cried, rushing forward. Suddenly, he was hit by a well-aimed radish and was knocked unconscious.

      Everyone stared at leb388. "What?" she asked. "He was in my way."

      Shankly looked at Al. "Uh, anyways--I will return! The Dung god never surrenders!" He disappeared in a puff of smoke.

      Everyone started cheering. Suddenly there was a flash, and Megz, leb388, and Jamez found themselves in some sort of lobby.

      "Where are we?" Megz asked.

      "I have no clue. I'm just glad that we got rid of the Dung god," leb388 laughed. "To think, three kids and some faeries defeated him with his own dung! But who's going to do the Times now?"

      "Eh." Megz shrugged.

      Jamez picked up his hackey-sack ball and started playing with Six, his Shoyru, who also suddenly appeared in the lobby.

      Leb388 snapped her fingers. "I've got it! Let's make Poptart do the Times! She already does the Editorial."

      "ARE YOU NUTS?" Megz exclaimed. "She'll delay it every week!"

      "Mwahahahahaha!"

      "Um, who said that?" leb388 asked nervously, looking around for the person who was maniacally laughing.

      Megz and leb388 looked at Jamez and Six, who were by now happily playing hackey-sack, and they shrugged.

      "It was I!" A person stepped out from the shadows. It was Number 6, the creator of Neopets. "Thank you for participating in that little alpha test. Unfortunately, you have won. No matter! It was an erroneous program anyway."

      "You mean--this was a game?" Jamez asked, kicking the hackey-sack. "And stop stealing my pet's names."

      "Yeah," Six replied, elbowing the hackey-sack back to Jamez.

      "Oh, no. Our names are similar, yet entirely different. As for the 'game'...well, yes, you could call it that," Number 6 grinned. "But the test-run failed. You Neopians are more powerful than we thought you were."

      "Of course," Megz replied.

      "So that was it?" leb388 gasped. "This war, Shankly being the Dung god, and everything else was just made up?"

      "Technically, all of Neopets is a fantasy game," Number 6 said. "But, under penalty of banishment, all of you must swear to secrecy--never will you reveal what happened in the past few days to another Neopian, Faerie, or Neopet. Everyone else had their memories erased. Mr. Shankly will still be doing the Times every week. And you must return your weapons."

      "You mean...." leb388 looked at her Radish Bow. "You can take the Crystal Boomerang, but I've grown attached to this!"

      "Sorry, but it won't be of any use to you once you get back to Neopia," Number 6 replied.

      The trio slowly handed over their Battledome weapons, and after they promised never to reveal the "program," another flash sent them back to Neopia Central.

      "That sure was weird," Megz said with a sigh. "Want to get some Borovan, guys?"

      "Count me in," Jamez and Six chorused.

      "Just a second--I need to mail something." Leb388 walked over to a NeoMailbox. "It's for the Times. Since I can send in a submission now, I don't want it to be late." She slipped in the submission in the mail slot and walked back to Megz. "I'm sure glad that whole dung this is over."

      A pair of familiar glasses glowed in the dark, and a pair of eyes behind the glasses peered from the mail slot "Or is it... mwahahaha! Um, can someone help me out of here?"

The End

Previous Episodes

Dungism: Part One

Dungism: Part Two

Dungism: Part Three

Dungism: Part Four

Week 77 Related Links

Back in Time: The Lost Desert - Part Four
"Listen, Li--I'm headed back to Neopia, and I was wondering. Well, you seem like a Neopian, even though you're dressed like you live here in the Desert. Would you mind coming back to Neopia with us?"

by leb388



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