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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 17th day of Sleeping, Yr 23
The Neopian Times Week 38 > Articles > Stop the Madness!

Stop the Madness!

by soggydude

Small note: This is a, well, creative (I hope) article about what NOT to do in Neopia. I hope you enjoy it and learn from it. In case you want to know why in Neopia I would create an article like this, well it's because a friend at school bet me that I couldn't write an article that would be weird and yet have a point. Prepare to lose your bet buddy....

Hello, this is an answering machine. Soggydude can't pick it up right now because he's gone mad. Below are the reasons why and what happened to him...

Bad shops

Have you ever gone inside the chat boards, and saw a great deal for a codestone, but as soon as you go there, you have to wait forever for some five minute tune even though you're only going to be there for about ten seconds? Then come the guild banners, the adoptables, the picture links, and the "Vote for my pet" pictures, which wouldn't be too bad if they weren't so HUGE and ANIMATED! This can be very stressful when one is on a job, and has only a few minutes to complete it. Also a pain is when the background changes to a dark colour matching the text of the prices completely, therefore making it a need to highlight the prices. Another bad thing is a gallery with buyable items. Do you know how annoying it is too see items priced at 100,000 Neopoints along with your regular shop prices? You have to scroll down a whole lot, and spend more time in the shop. Also, fix the prices. Who's going to pay 1,000 Neopoints for an omelette that they can get free daily?

Blood pressure rose in soggydude...

Advertising on someone else's board

This is not only annoying, it's very rude. You post that you have books, food, or a wanted item for a good amount lower then the Shop Wizard. As soon as it's up, a snobbish person posts, "My prices are WAY lower than this guys! If you want the real good prices, come to my shop!" People click to go to your shop, and see the ad. They then go to his or her shop, thinking the prices are cheaper, which they may or may not be.

Veins began to come out from soggydude...

Misusing the RP boards

You look at the RP boards, but not a single Lupe RP has been started. Naturally, you create one. People who do want to RP Lupes come and you have a good time. Then some user comes up and posts, "LUPES SUCK!" or "YOU'RE LOSERS FOR RPING YOUR PETS!" Sometimes the user may post something annoying such as one soggydude received-- "A fire Nimmo walks up and knocks over all the cans in one shot. "You need practice," he mutters and walks away." How annoying is that? If you are going to RP, hang around and don't insult others. Also don't ask someone to change something in the RP that they created. You don't like it, go make your own. And annoyers please post only once every now and then; we don't need a list of ten things not to do in malls every half hour.

Soggydude began to go red...

Guild Invites

You're doing whatever you do usually, when a guild invitation pops up. You read it. "Sounds fun," you say to yourself and join. Of course, that's what the person who sent you it hopes you think that, and that's not bad. But what about FIVE invitations at the same time? From the same person? Also, make sure that you don't keep bugging them if they don't join, they'll just block you. Also don't create new accounts to send them messages. A very, very important thing to remember is too not send them an invite if they are already in a guild, it's not like they are going to quit the one they are currently in and join yours.

Soggydude snaps the pencil he was holding in his hand...

Trading Post No-Nos

You're looking at the trading post, and see a must have paintbrush. You rush to make an offer, but see, "SORRY, THIS IS FOR SAFEKEEPING." Safekeeping? Why not put it in your safety deposit box or shop? Also annoying is "NEOMAIL ME WITH OFFERS" when the person will only accept Neomails for friends, or if they have over one hundred messages. The latter should always be prevented if you have a valuable item in the Post. Another bad thing to do is put "JOIN MY GUILD AND GET COOL STUFF LIKE THIS!" Great, but I'm already in a guild. Anyone who safe keeps or shows off items prevents someone who wants to sell their item from having their lot in the search results. If you are reading this and you have something like this, remove it now before finishing this article.

This was the last straw. Soggydude ran out laughing like a maniac...

Remember, only YOU can help to stop the madness. Don't do these things and users like soggydude won't suffer from going mad. If you want to donate to the "Get soggydude out of jail" fund, please press 1 now. If you would like to say something to calm him down, press 2 now. If you would like to give him a gift to make him happy, press 3 now. If you think this article was a waste of energy and space, then please run and hide when soggydude is out of jail. If you would like to leave a message for soggydude, please wait for the beep and leave your name, but not your phone number. Maniacs are unpredictable and are known to attack anyone or anything for no reason. This is for your own safety.

BEEE--SMASH!

"BE GONE INFERNAL ANSWERING MACHINE! FEEL THY WRATH OF THE BASEBALL BAT!"

"STEP AWAY FROM THE MACHINE, I REPEAT, STEP AWAY FROM THE MACHINE!"

"NEVER! YOU WON'T CATCH ME COPPERS! MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

It's me again. No I didn't go insane, that was just for the article. Basically follow the advice and Neopia will be a happier place! Also press 3 to give me something... a Hidden Tower item would really perk up my day. You aren't going to give me anything? THEN YOU WILL FEEL MY WRATH ONCE I'M OUT OF HERE! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Week 38 Related Links

Total Neoaccess
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