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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 11th day of Eating, Yr 23
The Neopian Times Week 118 > Short Stories > Rice Cracker Rush

Rice Cracker Rush

by bludragn3

"Okay, everyone, lunch is ready!"

     There was the sound of several Neopets and a dragon immediately abandoning what they were doing and running down the stairs to the kitchen. Azure had a ridiculously sized chef's hat on her yellow Kyrii head.

     "Yay! Lunch! What's cooking?" Darkmoon, the perpetually hungry green Gelert said.

     "Oh, you'll see. I decided to try something different this time," Azure answered.

     The ten Neopets and Bluey, the owner, took their seat at the kitchen table. Azure brought out a tray of mystery food.

     Gatling, a green Lupe, licked his lips while Emerald's green Krawk mouth formed a smile.

     "Enjoy!" Azure pulled off the tray's cover, revealing twelve rice cakes.

     The ten seated pets and Bluey looked at the rice cakes with bewilderment. "You're feeding us coasters?" Spirit, a blue Zafara, asked.

     "No, they're not coasters, silly," Azure said, grinning, "they're rice cakes. They're very healthy."

     Darkmoon reluctantly touched one, then grabbed it and took a bite out of it.

     "What is this? This stuff tastes like... like..." Darkmoon started. "Dragoon, help me out, what's something that tastes bad?"

     "Come on, Darkmoon," Azure said. "It can't be that bad."

     "Well, taste aside, why didn't you cook any more, Azure?" Gatling asked. "There's only one for each of us here."

     "I know. You guys eat enough to feed an army. We should really lower our portions. You boys have really been putting on pounds," Azure said.

     The boys acted like they were just told that they had bad game playing skills.

     "I'm not getting fat, right?" Dragoon, a green Shoyru, asked timidly. He was the skinniest of them all.

     "Well, you guys can put a something on the rice cakes to give them a little more flavor if you want," Azure stated, taking her place on the table (which was ironically was between Bastet and Emerald and opposite of Darkmoon's spot).

     "Ooh, goody!" Spirit jumped up and took his rice cake to the kitchen.

     Azure took her rice cake and was about to eat it. "And another thing, guys, I can't believe the amount of meat we eat."

     "Good job on the rhyme," Spirit called from the kitchen, his tail the only thing visible from behind the refrigerator door.

     "I'm a carnivore, and I'm proud of it," Bluey said, grinning with pride. "Everyone knows dragons need plenty of meat in their diet."

     "Well, be that as it may, I know Neopets don't need as much," Azure replied.

     Spirit returned from the kitchen with his rice cake piled with sliced deli meat and cheese.

     "Like Spirit there. Zafaras don't need to be eating up the world's meat supply."

     "What about me?" Spirit asked, oblivious to the conversation.

     "Azure's saying you eat too much meat, and by the look of it, you do," Bastet, a red Aisha, said.

     Spirit looked down at his meat and cheese rice cake. "Oh, I didn't know what you felt about that..." Spirit stuffed the treat into his mouth and smiled.

     "Oh, Spirit!" Azure retorted.

     "Look, Azure's got a good point here. We do need to eat healthier," Emerald stated.

     "Sykes agrees with me, don't you, Sykes?" Azure asked.

     Sykes the blue Wocky was obviously daydreaming. "What?"

     "And I'm sure Legionnaire knows a lot about food, why doesn't he say something?" Chrono, a yellow Draik, said.

     Legionnaire, a blue Scorchio, looked up. "Uh... well... it is true that you need a balanced diet..."

     "See? Legionnaire agrees with me!" Azure stated.

     "Well, let's not be..." Legionnaire started.

     "Bluey sure hasn't said much, I'll bet he knows what's best for the boys," Strike, a blue Ixi, said.

     Bluey was uncharacteristically nibbling on his rice cake. "What? Oh, I'm staying neutral on this matter."

     "Neutral?" Darkmoon replied. "Bluey, the boys and I need your support!"

     "No! Don't go to the boys' side! Join our side, the girls!" Bastet said.

     Bluey held his head in his claws. "Aaah, I can't take this deadlock anymore!" Bluey got up and ran out of the living room.


"Take this, Darkmoon!" Gatling shouted.

     Gatling and Darkmoon were playing a game with a deck of cards. The player with the higher card value in each "battle" won, and earned the honor of trash-talking the other player.

     "Oh yeah? How about this one?" Darkmoon taunted.

     Darkmoon slapped down a card. Gatling's eyes widened. "No! That beats me!"

     Darkmoon laughed maniacally. "Yes, you have lost this battle, my insolent brother!"

     "Cram it!"

     "Oh, I will. Down your throat!"

     The two canine Neopets snarled and growled at each other like they usually did when they played games together. Then, suddenly, the two got into a physical fight. They both gnawed on each other. Gatling yipped while Darkmoon tried his best to not to yelp himself. Bluey walked in just in time before it got really serious.

     "Darkmoon, Gatling, knock it off!" Bluey commanded.

     Gatling and Darkmoon immediately get off of each other. Darkmoon had a mouthful of Lupe fur which he nonchalantly spit out. "Oh, hey, Bluey... how's it going?"

     Bluey said, "I can't have you guys chewing on each other every time you play games. You've really got to stop being so competitive."

     Darkmoon and Gatling looked down at their paws. "Okay..." they said reluctantly.

     Bluey wandered into the kitchen. "After that strange lunch, I've been so hungry all day."

     "Tell me about it," Gatling said.

     Azure walked into the room.

     "Azure's an okay cook and everything, but I really wish she'd stop feeding us weird food," Bluey continued. He was snooping around the refrigerator for a snack.

     "Uh... Bluey?" Darkmoon started. Azure was getting angry.

     "I mean, come on! Rice cakes? That's got to be the stupidest idea she's ever had!"

     Azure growled, more like a Gelert than a Kyrii. "What are you saying about my cooking, Bluey!?"

     There was the sound of a dragon's head smashing into a refrigerator shelf. "Azure! I... d-didn't know you were there."

     "I thought you'd be the most tolerant of my food, Bluey! But I guess my sisters are my only allies in this family!" Azure shouted.

     "Now, Azure, that's not what I meant..."

     But it was too late. Azure ran sobbing out of the room. Bluey ran into the living room, but Azure was already gone.

     Darkmoon walked over and patted Bluey's back. "Well, Bluey, you really did it this time..."


Legionnaire's lab... "And so that's my story, Legionnaire," Bluey finished.

     Legionnaire was pouring a blue liquid into a test tube containing a red liquid. "Well, this is a pickle." The blue liquid and red liquid combined to make a purple one. "But I have an idea. In order to get Azure to like you again, you need to turn yourself into a Kyrii and apologize."

     "Okay, that makes... hey! Wait a second here! Turn myself into a Kyrii?" Bluey inquired.

     "Of course! I did some research and it turns out that Kyriis are most forgiving with their own species. A lot of Neopets are like that, actually." Legionnaire put the test tube on a rack and opened a drawer. "Here, I happen to have a Kyrii morphing potion right here. Drink it, and Azure will be happy to forgive you."

     Legionnaire handed the blue potion to Bluey. Ironically, it almost matched the color of Bluey's scales. "Um... that's a lot of work just to apologize. And what if the potion backfires and I never become a dragon again or I turn into some kind of reptilian... wait."

     "Trust me, this is the best thing you can do in this situation."

     "Well... okay..." Bluey closed his eyes and drank the potion...


Azure's room...

     Azure was sobbing while her four sisters were consoling her. "There, there, Azure," Emerald said, "I'm sure Bluey didn't mean to hurt you..."

     "Well... he shouldn't have... said something like that!" Azure said between sobs.

     "Do you think Bluey really wanted Azure to hear that?" Chrono whispered to Bastet.

     "No, no! Bluey isn't that inconsiderate," Bastet whispered back.

     Azure sniffled, and then there was a knock at the door.

     "Who is it?" Strike asked, as Azure was too busy crying to answer. "It's Bluey... I wanted to make amends..." Bluey's voice sounded.

     The girls were reluctant to let him in, as it was a girl's room and the laws of nature forbid a boy going into a girl's room. But they decided to at least let him try to apologize. Azure opened the door and her jaw dropped, as did the jaws of the other girls in the room.

     "Bluey? ...Is that... you?" Chrono asked.

     Standing in the doorway was a handsome blue Kyrii, with Bluey's voice. Apparently, the potion wasn't powerful enough to make a complete transformation, as Bluey's dragon wings were still existent. "Yeah! I changed myself into a Kyrii so you'd forgive me!"

     Azure thought about this. "Forgive you, eh?"

     "See, Azure, ever since I said the stuff I said, I've been hoping you'd find it in your heart to forgive me... so I took a Kyrii morphing potion to show you how sorry I am!" Bluey grinned.

     Azure looked at Bluey, smiled, and then slammed the door in his face. "Go take a shrinking potion for all I care!"

     Bluey fell on the floor. "Aw, it didn't work! Well... hopefully I'll get my regular dragon form soon..."


Bluey (who was still a blue Kyrii) was now in Dragoon's room, pleading for help. Unbeknownst to Bluey, it was a lot easier for Dragoon to give advice when Bluey was the same size as him.

     The Shoyru put his paw to his chin. "Hmm... becoming the same species as Azure didn't work... I can't really think of anything that would."

     "There's gotta be something I can do," Bluey said.

     "Oh! I know! Darkmoon, Spirit, Sykes, and Gatling went out to get pizza. You know how Azure would feel about that! If you go down there and tell them to stop, Azure might see it and know that you're on her side!"

     "That's a great idea, Dragoon! I'll do that right now!" Bluey started for the door. "Er, you don't happen to have any spare Dragon morphing potions on hand, do you, little buddy?"

     Dragoon said, "Actually, you can't call me 'little' anymore, Bluey, you're the same size as me!"

     Bluey laughed nervously. "Hee hee, right..." As Bluey walked out, Dragoon could see Bluey's frightened expression.


Darkmoon, Sykes, Spirit, and Gatling were at the local Pizzaroo. They were waiting at one of the tables with visions of pepperoni pizzas in their minds.

     "This is gonna be great..." Spirit licked his lips.

     Pizzaroo himself walked over to the boys' table. "Gentlemen, I am-a proud to present this beautiful pizza to you," Pizzaroo said with an authentic Italian accent. "I hope you enjoy this..."

     "STOP!!" A blue Kyrii appeared in the doorway.

     "Huh?" the boys wondered out loud.

     "What's-a going on?" Pizzaroo asked.

     Bluey ran over to the boys' table. "Guys, you can't eat this pizza. Azure will be furious!"

     "Bluey, is that you?" Sykes asked.

     "Yes, long story. Anyway, you can't go through with this, or else Azure will be..."

     Surprise, surprise, Azure appeared in the doorway now. She didn't look happy. "So... you guys think you can just go out and treat yourselves to a pizza?"

     Pizzaroo was a little worried. "Uh... I see you've got something to take care of, I'll bring this out later then..." he disappeared.

     "Azure, we were just..." Darkmoon started.

     "Silence!" Azure demanded. Even Bluey recoiled. "And Bluey, I can't believe you'd be the one to actually bring them out!"

     "Azure, it's not how it looks!" Bluey explained.

     "No! I'm tired of you guys. We're going home, RIGHT NOW!!"


Bluey, badly beaten up and finally back to being a dragon, laid on his bed. Dragoon was at his side, trying to offer psychological help. "So that's my story, Dragoon. Azure went crazy on us and I took most of her rage," Bluey said.

     "Oh, I'm sorry, Bluey..." Dragoon started.

     "Nah, it's not your fault. I can't help but feel partially responsible. If I had just been tolerant of her health food..."

     "Well, on a happier note..." Dragoon said, smiling.

     "Yeah?" Bluey asked.

     "Azure's giving us two rice cakes tonight!"

The End

Author's Note: Well, another story completed. How did you like it? If you thought it was awesome, drop me a Neomail. But no hatemail or Azure will cook you dinner! Support the technocratic intellectualism and thanks for reading!

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