ICE CAVES - Welcome to Lifestyles of the Affluent and Illustrious, sponsored
by The Neopian Times Appreciation Guild! I'm Slamina83, your reporter for this
edition. I'm standing inside the beautiful Ice Caves of Terror Mountain, where
I will be interviewing today none other than the most adventurous Lupe in all
Neopia, Garon the Lupe.
*Looks at watch* Unfortunately, he hasn't shown up yet. He was supposed to
have met me here a half an hour ago. There's a backpack here, but no Garon.
Well, until he gets here, I guess I'll give you a refresher on what he's accomplished
in his many years.
Extreme bravery - He explored and survived the three most dangerous
caves in Neopia: namely, the Ice Caves (where I am now) and the Faerie Caves
and Uber-Faerie Caves (which were designed and built for Garon by the smartest
faeries in Neopia).
Riches - The treasures he collected while exploring the caves (as well
as whatever the Faerie Queen gave him as a reward for completing them, which
we'll hopefully find out when he gets here) made him one of the richest Lupes
Star of his own games - He is the star of a series of games based on
his adventures, each of which gets tens of thousands of plays every day.
Fame - His picture has been on the Action button of the games room for
nearly three years. (Oddly, since his games are in the puzzle category. : P)
He also appears on the maps of Neopia three times, more than any other individual
And, most importantly, he has his own collectable card. (After all,
you're not REALLY a successful Neopian unless you have your own card.) ^_^
To my right, Garon bursts through a wall of snow.
Oh good! He's here!
The yellow Lupe frantically runs up to me, grabs me by the arm, and pulls
me behind a wall of ice. A few seconds later, a couple of giant snowballs roll
past our hiding place and crash into a wall some distance away.
Garon: Whew! That was a close one! *catches breath* Sorry I'm late. I got hung
up back there.
I'd like to ask you a few questions about yourself.
First of all, what are you doing now that the Faerie Cave challenges are over?
Garon: I'm exploring the Ice Caves again.
I thought that you finished that.
Garon: I had, but you know that earthquake that hit the Ice Caves a few years
ago and opened up the way to Tyrannia? It also opened up a whole new section
of the caves. I found out when I returned here from Faerieland early last year
to visit my cousin Tarquin. I decided to slip back in here for old time's sake,
and discovered that the place had changed completely. It was a welcome sight,
for I had finished all the caves the Faeries had thrown at me and reading my
classic book collection wasn't pacifying my need for adventure anymore. I needed
somewhere challenging and exciting to explore again, so I started doing so in
the new caverns.
Okay, next question: Where do you live?
Garon: If you mean where my NeoHome is located, it's in Faerieland, on Faerie
Castle Road. I had it built there so I would have somewhere to stay while the
faeries built the Faerie Caves and Uber Faerie Caves for me.
Judging from the amount of treasure you must have gotten from the caves, it's
probably as big as the Faerie Queen's palace itself. How many rooms does it
have? Let me guess. Twenty...
Garon: *stops me by waving his paw, his eyes closed* No, actually. I only have
three. That's all I really need. It's just enough space to hold a bed, my library
of classic books, and my fridge.
I wasn't expecting that, considering how much treasure you're fabled to have.
Garon: Yup. I'm only in there every once in a while anyway. I can't bear to
spend all my time in a NeoHome. I need to be out doing something exciting and
adventurous. So I spend my week out here, losing myself in the caves. If I get
really lost and am forced to stay here overnight, which often happens, I just
make myself a temporary home wherever I am with the items I have in this backpack.
*pats the backpack sitting beside him*
Garon opened up the backpack and started pulling out items one by one.
Garon: First, my Tent in a Box, so I'll have somewhere to sleep at night. Second,
a week's supply of Meaty Lupe Treats, my fave, in case I get hungry. Third,
a Chia plushie, in case I need to vent some frustration. Next...*pulls out a
Fuzzie bear, blushes, and quickly stuffs it back in.* Forget that you saw that.
I also keep some slushies with me. The strong kinds, like Fire and Ice and Sour
Lemon. They keep me alert: my eyes wide open and my sniffer nice and clear.
I extended my hand to stop him.
Hold on, I just thought of something... if you have such a small NeoHome, where
do you keep all that cave treasure that you've gotten?
Garon: Oh, the Snowager keeps it for me.
Garon: Yep. When I originally got lost in these Ice Caves, I kept accidentally
stumbling into that ice worm's cave over and over again. It happened so many
times that eventually, it stopped bothering to attack me. So now if I come in,
it just ignores me. I can come in freely and store my treasure in the back of
the Snowager's pile and it will guard it. And no, I don't have to worry about
those Neopets that snatch the Snowager treasure taking it either, because none
of them take the risk of walking around to that side.
Okay, one more thing, Garon. The big question everyone wants to know: What
did the Faerie Queen give you for completing the Faerie Caves?
Garon: *smiles* You want to know? I'll show you. C'mon.
Garon leads me through a maze of caverns to a rear entrance of the Snowager's
cave. As we enter, the Snowager awakens and turns to look at us, but on seeing
Garon, lazily turns back around and goes back to sleep. Garon walks up unworried
to the Snowager's pile and drags out an unusually large, ultranova-decorated
chest. With his back to me, he opens it with a gold key that he had in his backpack
and pulls out a large, white object. Then he turns to me and holds it up.
Garon: A lousy T-shirt! That's what I got!
Well, I think that's all the time we have. Thank you, Garon, for letting me
Garon: My pleasure. Come visit me again sometime.
Garon puts everything back, bows Lupe-style, then walks out of the Lair.
Well, that's it for this edition of Lifestyles of the Affluent and Illustrious.
Join us next time, when...
The Snowager shuffles in his sleep.
...Another... famous Neopian will be... interviewed.
The worm opens its eyes, raises its head, and glares at the now Lupeless
Uh... this is Slamina83... passing out.